Dear Gulf News,
I work in a place with a very toxic work environment, but I can’t quit as I need the money. What can I do to stay sane?
Answered by Dr Saliha Afridi, a clinical psychologist, Founder and Managing Director of The LightHouse Arabia
Dear Reader,
Toxic work environments can take a toll on a person’s mental and physical health. Whether it is having a narcissistic boss, being around unsupportive or discouraging colleagues, or being in a workplace that is full of cliques, gossip or rumors, having to deal with a toxic place requires a strategy as “taking the high road” and “positive thinking” will not be a long-term solution.
Removing yourself from a toxic workplace will definitely need to be part of your long-term strategy, however, when leaving right away is not an option, some of these tips might be helpful:
1. Make your space, yours: As much as possible, create a soothing work desk space for yourself. This could mean having pictures aromas, or music that can evoke a sense of peace and calm. Noise cancellation headsets, desktop natural oil diffusers, pictures of nature or loved ones, and other sensory reminders will help to ground you and soothe you.
2. Find your work tribe and learn together: Chances are if you are feeling weighed down, then others are feeling that way too. Look for people that you can talk to about your day who will understand you and your plight. Sharing your concerns and learning coping skills from each other is helpful, but be beware that it doesn’t become a venting session day in and day out. You could add to your own negativity and the negativity of others around you if you stay in the complaint-space and don’t move into the solution- space.
3. De-stress daily: Plan to do something stress-relieving every day before, during, or after work. This could be working out before work, sitting outdoors during lunch, or going out for dinner with your favorite person. The goal is to counteract the negative effects of a toxic work environment with positive feelings.
4. Zip up your energy: This will require you to visualize yourself wearing and energy armor and protecting yourself from the negative forces around you. Repeat mantras like ‘observe don’t absorb’ and ‘return to sender,’ when you are experiencing toxic energy.
5. Reframe and learn: Shifting your thinking from “why is this happening to me, make it go away?!” to “this is happening for me, what can I learn from this?” will move from a victim of toxicity to a learner from adversity. This mindset looks at everything happening to you as a way to grow you and evolve you, psychologically, emotionally, and spiritually. If you look at any great man or woman in history, they have endured great hardships and adversity and they transmuted those difficult experiences into self-mastery and wisdom.
6. Prepare an exit strategy: You may not be leaving right away but you should start thinking about what that could look like. If you are in a profession you love but just a workplace that you don’t like, then start working on your CV, applying to other companies, and preparing for interviews. If you are in a profession and a workplace that you don’t like, then figure out what you want to change your career too and start building the skill set to make the move. Don’t be afraid to start all over again … life is too short to be doing things you don’t enjoy, and too long when you are doing things you don’t enjoy!
If you have questions that you would like answered by a mental health professional in the UAE, please write in to readers@gulfnews.com. Also, please let us know if you'd rather stay anonymous.
Disclaimer: This blog is a conversation and is not an alternative for treatment. The recommendations and suggestions offered by our panel of doctors are their own and Gulf News will not take any responsibility for the advice they provide.
