Ever noticed how it seems someone from the workplace seems to have been away for a whole month on holiday while your leave was a mere four weeks?
Spotting a familiar face after what appears to be ages elicits a similar response from all those who greet his arrival. Of course, no one will admit that they are surprised he has been away as they hadn't even noticed.
And then the comments start, with conjecture on how long he has been away. As the guesses about the span of the holiday reaches outrageous proportions, the holiday taker's pleasant memories of his trip begin to recede. Now he is on the defensive. He brushes aside all the preposterous numbers with regard to the duration of his vacation.
Treating each observation with the disdain it deserves, he makes it a point of telling everyone within hearing the precise number of days he has been away. When that morsel of information doesn't seem to appease anyone, he huffily says that in any case he still has 25 days annual leave to his credit.
This last disclosure starts a fresh debate with discussion on the number of times this particular person seems to have been away. Although said in jest, there is an underlying note of seriousness, like half-truths emerging from the shadows.
Fighting back
When the charges against him seem to go beyond what is acceptable to him, he hits back at each of his detractors. They soon find themselves at the receiving end as a salvo of questions is aimed at them.
The quiz master doesn't require any answers as he has all the data at his fingertips. Their annual holiday schedules are recited chapter and verse and from the gob smacked expressions on their faces, he knows he has hit home.
That is when he makes a grand exit, leaving the sceptics at a loss for words as each mentally examines his own holiday record. After some honest soul-searching, there is a realisation that they are not beyond reproach.
Deciding to let bygones be bygones, it is tacitly agreed that no one will rake up the past. Soon bonhomie is the spirit of the day and the treats are laid out on the table for everyone to enjoy.
There are oohs and aahs of appreciation. Of course, there will always be some ingrates who may remark on the limited amount of the goodies. But even this has its risks as the gourmand is reminded of the time he went on holiday and came back empty-handed. If he feigns amnesia, there are many willing to help prod his memory.
People can be divided into two categories: the silent holiday taker and the voluble one. The former is the one who slips away quietly without any formal notice to colleagues or friends of his imminent absence. One day he's there, the next he isn't. For a couple of days one assumes he has taken short leave or has changed his days off. When the days turn into weeks, the ‘eureka' moment arrives.
There might be some hurt feelings as you wonder why you were kept in the dark. It's not as if he is off on some secret mission. After all neither of you works for intelligence. And his return is as low-key as his departure. There is no description or details of his time off. His closely guarded private life is kept just that.
Type B is however not averse to letting everyone in on the secret. There will be a countdown and a recital of his itinerary. Soon everyone at the workplace knows what, where, when and how. That's when they conjure up mental pictures of the ten most effective ways of making someone stop talking.
I try my best to fall in the first category but it's hard, really hard, to stifle the urge to disseminate knowledge.
