Talking about our childhood can bring forth a series of emotions, including nostalgia, joy, sadness, trauma, and freedom. I was a cheerful, mischievous, restless, and endlessly energetic young kid.
My mum always loved and cared for me deeply even through her debilitating struggle with misdiagnosed Lyme disease, which turned out to be the life-threatening brain and spinal cord disease of multiple sclerosis. My dad traveled frequently throughout my childhood but when we were together, I felt enveloped by his wisdom and unwavering generosity.
I was born in Munich, Germany, and grew up living and traveling throughout Europe, the Middle East, North America, and Asia - at the crossroads of two fairly different cultures, my mum being an artistic Italian from the eternal city of Rome and my dad being an internationally minded Saudi businessman from the port city of Jeddah.
I am a Saudi 19-year-old, who is currently working on bringing his creative projects to life, as well as studying at the John Cabot University of Rome, Italy.
As aforementioned, I grew up primarily with my mother and she was subject to my chaotic, dissociated, and dysfunctional behaviour throughout my infancy and childhood. This situation culminated in my mum taking me to see a psychiatrist when I was 8 years old because I was having considerable trouble staying focused in class, conforming to the standard school curriculum, and communicating with my teachers. Furthermore, I was belligerent, had zero concept of time, was frequently daydreaming, and was completely disorganised.
For example, I would forget stuff at school daily and during nap time in some of my classes, I would yell, throw pillows, and be mischievous, which was affecting the well-being of my fellow students and the peaceful atmosphere that my teachers had tried to cultivate within their classrooms.
The female psychiatrist my mother and I went to meet in London first conducted an IQ test, which determined that I had a high intelligence quotient, then proceeded to conduct many other evaluative measures and procedures to figure out what exactly my disruptive streak in and out of school was stemming from. She concluded that I had ADHD or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, a condition that is controversially labeled as a “neurodevelopmental disorder”.
In most cases, ADHD is treated with a combination of behaviour therapy and medication. For preschool-aged children (4-5 years of age) with ADHD, behaviour therapy, particularly training for parents, is recommended as the first line of treatment before medication is tried. What works best can depend on the child and family. Good treatment plans will include close monitoring, follow-ups, and making changes, if needed, along the way, says the CDC.
The issue with this terminology is that people often perceive ADHD as being a handicap that limits people from succeeding and or impairs their ability to be successful. This is not the case, as there are countless inordinately successful individuals known to have ADHD, such as; Einstein, Michael Jordan, John F. Kennedy, Walt Disney, Jim Carrey, Michael Phelps, Bill Gates, Ryan Gosling, John Lennon, Dave Grohl, Kurt Cobain, Edward Hallowell, Simon Biles, Cammi Granato, Zooey Deschanel, SZA, Mel Robbins, Agatha Christie, Karina Smirnoff, and the list goes on.
However, despite this stellar list of fellow disruptors, the mainstream school experience and many aspects of my life were problematic.
I was very restless and during the night I would sing, chant or make loud noises, which was unpleasant for my parents, who were trying to sleep and this caused immense frustration for them. My streak of disobedience and irreverence added to me having a poor relationship with them and for much of my life due to how busy my parents were; being raised by nannies.
After my ADHD diagnosis, which my parents didn’t fully comprehend at the time, I felt as if I was a nuisance in the eyes of my school, my family, and anybody else who came into my life. Not long after came the medication for ADHD, which frustrated me, and made me antisocial, numb, and disturbed. Furthermore, it gave me persistent stomach aches and nausea.
My parents finally decided that my scholastic success was not worth me damaging my physical and mental health. Along with the stopping of medication, I began to go through a solitary and isolated three-year stint of homeschooling, because I was unmanageable within a scholastic setting. As a result, I had fewer interactions with kids my age and was academically not at par with the expectations of the mainstream school curriculum.
I lived in the UAE on and off from 2008 to 2014 because that was one of the central locations in which my father's business endeavours were based during these 6 years. At 12 years of age, I re-entered the mainstream school arena because my parents thought letting me try again was worth a shot and I ended up going through two years, including fifth and sixth grade, education at an international school in Abu Dhabi.
However, it became quite evident that I was struggling to cope, not only socially but on an academic level, especially with my math and science classes. Although, when it came to social studies, I showed a natural aptitude and interest. I struggled with being organised and following through on homework and scholastic obligations. Through all of this, my inner artist kept me company, as I drew frequently in and outside of the classroom and constantly aggregated information from a wide range of topics out of an insatiable curiosity that persisted within me.
My mum always encouraged me to draw, and I was frequently exposed to my older half-brother and father drawing and making art and that inspired me to draw, write and find ways to express myself creatively. I played the tuba and the trumpet at school and loved my improvisational theatre class, where I could act and use comedy as a medium to make people laugh and lighten their hearts. Watching television, making art, and listening to music shielded me from the menacing rigidity of systems that were not designed to cope with people like myself.
My mum always encouraged me to draw, and I was frequently exposed to my older half-brother and father drawing and making art and that inspired me to draw, write and find ways to express myself creatively. I played the tuba and the trumpet at school and loved my improvisational theatre class, where I could act and use comedy as a medium to make people laugh and lighten their hearts. Watching television, making art, and listening to music shielded me from the menacing rigidity of systems that were not designed to cope with people like myself.
The learning support department at my school tried its best to help me but the mystery of how to integrate me into the school effectively was unresolvable. So I was left feeling like a failure, desperate, and with drastically low self-esteem, as my parents looked for a potential solution. They researched and found a cutting-edge neuro scientifically backed yet controversial cognitive enhancement program. It is available all over the world but based in Canada, so my parents took a leap of faith and we moved there.
I can confidently say that the program changed my life. Seeing other extremely intelligent kids who had struggled at school was very inspiring to me because it made me feel a lot less isolated and alone. Additionally, having teachers who understood my predicament and were compassionate and receptive to all the strides that I was making is something that still makes me ineffably grateful to this day. Beyond all the brain-changing cognitive enhancement exercises, I developed a further love for writing in my mandatory English class and learned mathematics at a pace that felt drastically more digestible than the curriculum I had waged war against at the mainstream schools I had been to. I attended the program's school for two years and then even after having moved away from Canada, did their summer programs for a further 5 years.
Even though I still struggled significantly with mainstream school system, I was able to receive an International Baccalaureate/IB diploma, which is a slightly higher caliber equivalent of passing high school.
Even though I don’t care much for academia, passing high school seemed an impossible feat to me but I was able to harness and apply my focus to doing the perceived impossible.
Not long after high school, I moved with my mother and little brother to the UAE due to my mother and father's business ventures and stayed there until January of this year, when I relocated to Rome for university. Throughout this transitional period, I stayed creating as much writing, music, art, and creative content as I possibly could. Now I am building but confident in my creative capacities and abilities and am well on my way to becoming creatively successful through music, writing, poetry, art, podcasting and so much more.
I put myself in the shoes of my parents and other parents who have kids with ADHD, and I understand how difficult, confusing, and anxiety-inducing it can be. My ultimate advice would be to show them love, care, and nurture what they are inclined towards creatively, as well as put them in active and creative spaces so that they can express and find themselves as well as become conscious of their immense strength, joy, and value.
I put myself in the shoes of my parents and other parents who have kids with ADHD, and I understand how difficult, confusing, and anxiety-inducing it can be. My ultimate advice would be to show them love, care, and nurture what they are inclined towards creatively, as well as put them in active and creative spaces so that they can express and find themselves as well as become conscious of their immense strength, joy, and value.
Lastly, I would like to thank Gulf News for giving me the platform to tell my story, thank my parents for taking care of me through all of the trouble I put them through, thank my siblings for supporting me and thank all my teachers, nannies, and all others for giving me their time, resources and hearts.
I am blessed, I am grateful and I am creating a meaningful life for myself. To all the parents reading this, keep your heads high, you are filled with courage and power, and you too can help your kids triumph as my parents have helped me.
