Review: You've come a wrong way, baby

Since it was first published in 1984, Heidi Murkoff's What to Expect When You're Expecting, the go-to pregnancy guide, has landed in the hands of an endless stream of expectant mums and dads. The book's mission is clear: to shed light on the scary, exhilarating phase known as new parenthood.

The intentions of the ensemble film comedy that shares the book's title are less obvious. Is director Kirk Jones's film a farce, populated by crazy caricatures? Or is it a crash course in every potential prenatal complication? How about a dramatic account of failed pregnancy attempts and first bonds? The movie turns out to be a little of everything yet succeeds only occasionally at anything.

The big-name actors arrive onscreen in pairs, marching two-by-two toward the pitfalls of first-time parenthood. The characters include Jules (Cameron Diaz), a me-me-me type of a workout fanatic who hosts a fictionalised The Biggest Loser and meets Evan (Matthew Morrison) on a show that resembles Dancing With the Stars. When she becomes pregnant after just a few months of secretly dating him, the couple has to navigate some sticking points, including matching his-and-hers oversize egos.

A more serious and relatable couple, Holly (Jennifer Lopez) and Alex (Rodrigo Santoro), have dealt with fertility problems, money problems and — once they get the chance to adopt a baby from Ethiopia — a case of cold feet. These two couples alone could fill out a movie's minutes, but the pairs keep coming. Food-truck proprietor Rosie (Anna Kendrick) faces the implications of a one-night stand with her professional competition, Marco (Chace Crawford); Wendy (Elizabeth Banks) and Gary (Ben Falcone) finally get positive news after two years of ovulation alerts; and Gary's retired race-car-driving father, Ramsey (Dennis Quaid), finds out that his trophy wife, Skyler (Brooklyn Decker), is expecting twins.

The dialogue, facial expressions and comic timing of these talented actors are enough to carry the scenes, but once again screenwriters take something that works and throw on unnecessary additions.

The outlandish moments reach their heights with Wendy's story, but Banks manages to add some realism to her role of a woman struggling with the less-glowing aspects of pregnancy. If those afflictions ring true for some mums, other bits, such as when a woman delivers effortlessly while sneezing, exist only in Hollywood. The reality-fantasy paradox means audience members may get left behind when the film shifts into more serious terrain to contemplate lost jobs, lost pregnancies and life-threatening losses of blood. But what to expect from the movie? Among the hodgepodge of near-death moments and slapstick pratfalls, it's anybody's guess.