Reem was the daughter of my Social Studies teacher. She was a silent spectacled girl, who was studious. Till I met Reem, I had set some sort of an auto rule in my mind. If parents were thick friends, their children had to keep the tradition alive.
Zara was Elmuiz uncle’s daughter. Elmuiz uncle and Nilofer auntie were our family friends. Zara was in my class and was the same age as me. But Zara was mentally a great deal older than I was. In a childish way, she would pass upsetting remarks. “You’re getting on my nerves!” she would exclaim when she wanted to go out with other girls during the lunch break. So the equations never matched. I was never comfortable around her.
Then by a stroke of luck, our class teacher changed places and I sat next to Reem who was kind and pleasing. It was a pleasant change to be released from Zara’s sarcastic wit. Reem was my first experience with a real friendship. She was sensitive and attentive to my feelings. She was always there for me and looked out for me.
My best-ever memory with my first best friend was a moment after the Grade 9 exams. Reem made a secret call to let me know that I was the grade topper weeks before the results were announced. Her mother was on the invigilation committee and she heard the teachers talking about it while waiting for her mother in the staff room. Numerous such shared secrets sealed our friendship forever!
Besties share even brainwaves
Love comes in many different ways, and perhaps one of the strongest permutations is between two best friends. Scientific evidence shows that neural response patterns are remarkably similar among close friends. After grade 10, Reem returned to Goa and then went to the USA for further education. Gradually, we lost touch and the camaraderie was limited to the Facebook message box. But your first friend always stays in your heart and elicits a kind smile on your face.
In a world,
Stuffed with speed,
Bursting at its seams,
It’s refreshing to reminisce,
Simple souls …
That light your hearts,
And warm your thoughts.
About a year ago, I got an unexpected call from one of my dearest friends, who I hadn’t spoken to in quite a while. He had called to check in on me, as he saw that my daily poems had a tinge of melancholy in them. It was a call out of the blue, but talking to him was exactly what the heart doctor recommended for a maudlin poet. He got off the phone with, “I’m still here for you, okay?” Mental connections are rare, so if you meet people who understand you, keep them. People drift apart both mentally and geographically. Staying in touch becomes difficult. Yet a single moment of connection like this could cement friendship into a bond for life.
Last week, the Indian Social Center hosted the Indian Republic Day celebrations. I met this girl, Nisha, who was my new dance companion. She was highly energetic and very bubbly. We were quite boisterous while taking our selfies and coordinating our steps for insta-reels. In the meantime, she said, “I think I like you!” That was a mutual feeling. You find friends in the oddest of situations and you vssibe well with them. It makes you believe that you don’t meet people by accident! They are meant to cross our path for a reason. With the right people around, you grow every day.
Your first best friend and first love always remain special. There may be many moments in your life, when best friends are different people, at different times. But there is that one moment, one kiss, one glance, one dance, a moment of silence, and a quiet reckoning when time truly stands still reflecting the soul.
Feby Imthias is a writer based in Abu Dhabi and author of the book, Children of the Sun, Sand and Seas. Twitter: @Feby_Imthias
