On paying left and right

Move over USA - Dubai is the real, glittering and fully branded melting pot! Emphasis on the word "melting", please!

Having lived here for the past year I could not escape noticing - in many tangible, concrete and pocket-burning ways - how the place is actually re-inventing capitalism!

Take salaries for example; regardless of size, salaries are destined for immediate meltdown the moment you get a brief hold of them.

No matter where you stand, sit or lean when you get paid, salaries will be puffed at by some invisible genie out there, causing them to evaporate in hot air in front, or behind, your helpless eyes at rocket speed.

On any given month, before you can say "Voodoo-Economics-Kaka-Doodle", you are left at the mercy of your co-worker's generosity for your daily latte!

Not that money is in short supply here; the problem is that money is in over-supply-take-as-much-as-you-can-grab-all-the-time-mode, on one hand, while we who work here are being forced to pay left and right for unbelievable stuff, on the other hand - more on this later, stay tuned!

If you think I am exaggerating about money-over-supply; dig this if you can:

Banks are willing to loan money to every Tom, Dick and Harry relying on the flimsiest documentation process.

Car loans are becoming like cheap, plastic giveaways! All you need to qualify is announce you want one!

Credit cards are the ultimate no-brainers here! I guess they are being offered to 5-year-olds as we speak! I asked my bank for a credit card and they gave me three!

First I thought someone goofed - but when all my visiting friends were accumulating credit cards before leaving the airport, I knew that the banking system must have been designed by none other than "Goofy", with little help perhaps from "Mickey Mouse"!

I understand that some things are good to have fairly quickly and on short notice.

While you shouldn't wait to buy a mobile phone, rain-coat or a wig (among other non-printable smaller purchases) there should be a waiting period before you get a credit card or a car loan!

At least to allow someone to judge your mental capacity before you visit the mall and charge 200,000 dirham over a weekend, or sit behind the wheel and fly through red lights like a maniac!

Speaking of cars, have you renewed your car registration lately?

Shock of her life

A friend of mine got the shock of her life when she was charged Dh1,800 in traffic fines - based on personally-committed-photo-proven-minor-traffic-violations.

She was left wondering how come these huge fines are not reducing the high rate of one injury every two hours and one death every 15 hours - according to a recent Reuter's news report.

As for over paying, dig this of you can:

A friend of mine was rightfully irritated when she noticed that a well known international fast food chain is charging her a dirham for every packet of ketchup!

Upon a recent visit to a famous supermarket I had to pay a dirham to enjoy the distinguished privilege of pushing a cart!

Coming from California - where customer helpers will politely push the free cart for you all the way to the parking lot, unload your bags in the trunk slowly, carefully and patiently, refuse to take a tip because of the supermarket's strict policy - I find the dirham charge for using the cart inside the supermarket totally ridiculous, senseless and pure rip-off!

When I complained about this to the manager, he told me in a straight face that the dirham will be refunded if the customer simply returns the cart from the garage to the supermarket!

I see, you are with your family inside the hot-as-hell-unbelievably - crowded-garage, they are sitting patiently inside the not-yet-air-conditioned-car, waiting silently for you to unload your shopping bags, they could be tired/hungry/thirsty/bored/anxious/restless or all of the above - and you are expected to keep them there and push the cart all the way back to get your one dirham!

Ahmad Zahzah is a media consultant based in the UAE.