In the Indian ethos, a guest is exemplified as the embodiment of godliness. He is supposed to be welcomed with open arms. That is why I could never imagine that someday when one of your near and dear ones informs you that he is coming to stay with you for a few days, you will get panicky.
Instead of the usual, “Oh, you are most welcome”, you bluntly tell him, “NO, NO please do not come over. It is not safe. You know we are somehow surviving in the sea of Corona pandemic.” We are among those many that are facing such a predicament. To be or not to be is the poser that is teasing us.
The hard fact is that the Coronavirus has not spared Presidents, Prime Ministers, and such other high notches. How can it spare lesser mortals like us? For the past nine months since COVID-19 hit us all, my wife and I, both senior citizens, have been ordained not to venture out even to the lawns of our housing complex. And so, we are virtually under ‘House Arrest’ for these many months.
Magic of video call
It is unimaginable that for this long period, our relatives have not been able to visit us and vice versa, even on festive occasions when physical presence was a must. Thanks to whoever invented the magical concept of a ‘video call’ has filled the blank to some extent. But certainly, we could not have performed rituals and partaken festival-oriented delicacies that are prepared on that occasion once a year.
Currently, we are faced with a dilemma, which is so far defying a proper solution. My cousin’s son is getting married in mid-December when, according to medical experts, the pandemic would be at its peak. The very thought of our forced absence is heartbreaking. It is argued that marriages do not happen every day.
Even though hard restrictions have been prescribed by the Indian government, we all know that strict observance is simply impossible. We have already learnt not to shake hands but how can people congregating for ceremonies stand two metres apart from each other?
Believe or dismiss at your own peril
The mantra prescribed by doctors is, “Do not touch the person next to you. Treat him or her as a potent carrier of the virus who will pass it on to you to ‘forward to others’.” Believe it or dismiss it at your own peril but it is happening.
In effect, the rule of ‘social distancing’ is distancing us from our loved ones who are aware of the potential hazards but for them — and for that matter for us all — marriages are not everyday occurrences. They are once-in-a-lifetime happy moments for the bride, groom, their family, and dear ones.
In Indian families, it is a tough choice for the invitees because if you do not go, you spoil your relationships. If you go, you might come back with a package that may show you the way to a hospital.
It is ironic that the scourge of untouchability that had plagued the Indian society for ages was offloaded from our shoulders by Father of the Nation Mahatma Gandhi, is threatening to return in another sophisticated manner.
— Lalit Raizada is a journalist based in India.
