KHDA: The simple question swap that can get children talking to parents

Dubai: Few things frustrate parents more than asking their child about their day and being met with a one-word answer.

Whether it is a shrug, a quick "fine" or complete silence, many parents worry when children seem reluctant to share what is happening in their lives. According to parenting specialist Sophie Jones, the answer is often not asking more questions but creating the right environment for communication.

Speaking during a recent KHDA session on Parenting with Confidence, Jones shared practical strategies that can help parents build stronger communication with their children and encourage more open conversations.

One of Jones' biggest recommendations was active listening.

"When you give your child your full attention and eye contact, and when you show your child that you're actually engaged and listening and ready to share with them and support them, they are more likely to talk to you," she explained.

Rather than multitasking or rushing conversations, parents should focus on being fully present when their child is speaking.

According to Jones, showing genuine interest helps children feel heard and supported, making them more likely to continue sharing their thoughts and feelings.

Timing can make a significant difference when it comes to communication.

Jones noted that some children are most willing to open up just before bedtime, when they have an opportunity to discuss any worries before going to sleep.

For her own family, she found car journeys particularly effective.

"Whenever I would take my daughter home from school in the car, we have that 20 minutes where instead of that direct conversation sitting across the table from each other, actually being on a car journey helps to make it more comfortable and you can discuss those feelings," she said.

The key is finding the moments when children feel most comfortable talking.

Rather than relying on questions that can be answered with a simple yes or no, Jones encouraged parents to use open-ended questions.

Examples she shared included:

These types of prompts encourage children to express themselves more freely and can be particularly helpful as they get older.

"Those open-ended questions help children to express themselves without you asking them direct questions," she said.

Jones also stressed the importance of helping children understand and express their emotions.

Parents should acknowledge their child's feelings and let them know those emotions are valid.

"If your child does feel upset, well, that's okay, that's understandable. I'm here for you. How can we work through that together?" she said.

She added that children benefit from seeing adults model emotions in healthy ways, whether they are feeling happy, sad, frustrated or angry.

Another important principle is ensuring children feel safe sharing difficult experiences.

Jones advised parents to provide understanding and support regardless of what their child chooses to tell them.

"Sometimes your child will tell you things that you maybe don't want to hear, or that you're not happy with," she said.

The goal is to create a space where children feel comfortable coming forward and discussing challenges, before working together to find solutions.

Communication is also strengthened when children feel recognised for their efforts.

Jones encouraged parents to offer praise not only for achievements but also for behaviour, perseverance and personal strengths.

With increasing social and academic pressures, especially during the school years, she believes children benefit from regular encouragement that focuses on effort rather than outcomes alone.

Throughout the session, Jones repeatedly returned to the importance of trust.

Strong communication, she said, helps children feel secure and gives them the confidence to express their emotions and seek support when they need it.

Ultimately, getting children to open up is not about finding the perfect question. It is about listening, creating opportunities for conversation and building a relationship where children know they will be heard without judgement.