In search of peace

Clutching her child in one arm and balancing the suitcase on her head with the other, Gulshan wants to cross the deserted street as quickly as possible. She is leaving her home in Chakothi town amid the mounting tensions between the Pakistan and Indian forces along the line of control (LoC) which divides the Kashmir valley.

"I haven't slept for nights. If there is calm, I wait for those horrifying sounds. And whenever there is firing, I pray it will be calmed down. Living here is like living on a volcano," the 30-year-old Gulshan says.

Like Gulshan, hundreds of people with their families have left this town hardly a kilometre away from the LoC to take shelter in relatively safer places of the Pakistan part of Kashmir.

Gulshan, who hails from Badgam in Indian Kashmir, had lost her two brothers in fighting against Indian security forces in the early nineties.

Then her parents decided to send Gulshan across the LoC to relatives. Here she was happily married to her cousin.

"I thought my bad times are over, but a few years ago my husband was martyred. I did not even see his body," she recalls as tears ran over her cheeks. "I have lost all in these battles but I cannot lose my son now," she says.

For those who live in settlements along the LoC, "border tensions" between the two countries translates into misery and suffering – the loss of lives, loss of security and loss of livelihood. "We are destroyed every time they fight," says an elderly Mohammed Sharif.

"Mines are laid in our fields, our businesses are shut, our lives are at risk. We are ready to risk our lives but not our children. We have no other choice but to leave," Sharif says.

Sharif, 70, along with his family, has had to move out of this town five times during the past five years. "Migratory birds are better than us. At least they know their destiny. We do not even know when we have to migrate," he says.

"We do not live our life at our will. It depends on the relations of the two countries. We just want to live here in peace."

But Sharif's friend Mohammed Sadiq has a centuries old tale to tell about why there is bloodshed in this beautiful Kashmir valley.

"Our elders would tell us that these were the most beautiful mountains, an earthly paradise. And these mountains would protect us as long as they were revered for their beauty. But for decades now, they have echoed with gunfire. The mountains are angry. Their beauty has been overshadowed by destruction."

Officials and residents say the recent tensions have displaced thousands of people living along the LoC. "Whenever there is firing, these people suffer. It is human tragedy and we try our best to provide help and all the assistance to them," says a senior official Khwaja Mohammed Sadiq Dar, head of relief, rehabilitation and settlement in Azad Kashmir.

Officials say around 35,000 people living along the LoC were displaced following the tensions between the two countries after militants attacked the parliament building in Delhi last December.

Some 250,000 people had to leave their homes after the Kargil dispute which brought the two hostile nuclear powers closer to the war.

Now once again there is tension between Pakistan and India as tens of thousands of troops are deployed on the LoC. And people living along the LoC are leaving their homes. Sharif has shut down his business and has gone to live with his relative in Muzaffarbad.

Gulshan, who started her journey from Badgam, is heading for another journey. She is still in search of peace.