There was a touching story in a British newspaper about an elderly couple who called the emergency services because they were feeling lonely. The police officers who responded anticipated that they needed medical attention but in fact all they needed was someone to talk to.

The two officers obliged and sat down to a cup of tea and, when they departed, left behind two happy, elderly people who will certainly never forget the day the police called in for tea.

One can appreciate elderly or sick people feeling lonely but what about the “epidemic of loneliness” among people in their late 20s that I have been reading about recently? In the UK, apparently, 18-34 year olds are often more likely to feel depressed because of loneliness than people aged over 55. They should, in theory, have many interests in their lives but, in practice, loneliness can affect many young people and this can lead to increased stress, under-performance, depression and anxiety.

Telephone helplines can be a source of support and I am sure that the Samaritans Crisis Helpline would say that many of its callers are not necessarily suicidal but are “just lonely”. I remember when I was a Samaritan volunteer some years ago that our calls included many people who just wanted somebody to talk to and someone who would unconditionally listen to them without being judgemental.

I suppose, of course, that the elderly couple who phoned the emergency services could possibly have learned to use Facebook to keep in contact with others — but social networks cannot replace real-life, face-to-face relationships.

There is also the fact that becoming over-reliant on social media can exacerbate feelings of loneliness in many people of any age. The chances are that people who upload posts to Facebook are sharing news of having a new baby, celebrating a birthday or an educational achievement, pictures of a new car or holiday images from a memorable holiday. These are some of the typical ‘chatter’ you may read or see when you are surfing the web.

However, sometimes being a vicarious visitor in someone else’s life may leave you with feelings of jealousy or dissatisfaction because it often appears that everyone, apart from you, is having a good time. The point is that long-distance relationships via the web are very often less than satisfying because they lack emotion.

An ‘emoticon’ is inadequate to tell someone you love them... or hate them. For that, you need to see and hear or possibly touch. Most people would not buy a coat over the internet because they cannot feel or touch the material to see from what it is made. It’s the same with relationships.

You need to feel the vibes — you cannot achieve that electronically even with a fully charged battery and a Retina display with 5.6 million pixels!

Social networks can certainly appeal to our vanity and play to our vulnerability, plus we get instant gratification when someone likes our Facebook updates, retweets our post or reposts a picture from Instagram. We can be seduced into thinking that if we receive enough ‘likes’ on our Facebook page this will validate who we are and how the world sees us.

In my opinion, however, nothing can replace face-to-face conversations where we cannot hide behind our screens. Socialising online is good for when we do not have the time to see someone in person or to fill-in those moments when while in bed we want to “have a word” without having to get dressed.

But be in no doubt that the time we spend socialising online often discourages one–to-one conversations and can lower our confidence levels and undermine our ability to converse with real people with real problems and in real time.

So coming back to our elderly couple: even though they shouldn’t really have phoned 999 as it wasn’t an emergency, our policemen rose to the challenge and made two people very happy.

So I wonder, how many people did you make happy today by talking to them face-to-face?

Key points

* An online conversation is only uni-dimensional.

* For a multi-dimensional experience, go face-to-face.

* Do not phone emergency services if lonely!

The writer is CEO of an international stress management consultancy and the author of ‘Show Stress Who’s Boss!’.