..when darkness met light

Saturday, March 29, 2006. This is a date that is etched in Dina Ganda's memory for ever. It was a day that was supposed to be joyous, sparkling, laughter-filled, a day every person on earth looks forward to at some stage or the other ...

In Dina's case, it turned out to be full of mixed emotions.

"Even as a young girl, I used to dream of having a perfect wedding,'' says Dina. "I used to dream of holding my father's hand, walking down the aisle ..." Her voice begins to choke.

There were seven children in the Ganda household and "my father, Ahmed Ganda, though a very busy man (he was an attache in the immigration department in Thailand), made time to celebrate all our birthdays with us at home. He regarded these dates as very important and ensured that he was free to be with us on those days,'' she says.

Dina, who grew up in Thailand, recalls the many times her mother would point out the similarities in personality traits father and daughter shared.

Early 2001, Johannes Pijoh came into Dina's life. When Dina and Johannes decided to get married, their respective parents gave their blessings unreservedly.

Shortly after this, Johannes was offered a job in the UAE. When Dina told her father that she would be moving to the UAE after her marriage, he was angry and upset.

He would miss his daughter's presence, her argumentative nature and her stubborn streak, which so reminded him of himself.

Dina and Johannes decided to solemnise their marriage before Johannes left to take up his position in the UAE. The quickest and simplest route was to opt for a civil service marriage in Bangkok. "It did not feel like a proper wedding without the presence of family and friends," Dina recounts.

With only the two of them - no guests, no wedding outfits and merely a scrap of paper as proof of marriage - they felt the day to be wan.

It seemed to them as though life had tricked a special day (in February 2003) into turning into a very normal one.

After settling down in Abu Dhabi the same year, Dina and Johannes decided to invite all their relatives to a formal church wedding. It was to be towards the end of 2006.

But in March, Dina's father was diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver. She returned to Indonesia so she could accompany him to Malaysia to seek a second medical opinion. The diagnosis was grim. Doctors estimated that he had only two to four weeks left.

The news devastated Dina. She decided to organise her wedding as quickly as possible, and she also changed the location to Jakarta due to her father's condition.

March 29, 2006 was chosen as the wedding day, as her father was due to leave for Malaysia on April 2 to try an alternative treatment.

It was Friday, March 28. Dina woke up in a relatively happy state of mind. Tomorrow would be her wedding and her father would be so happy to see his 'baby girl' get married. That night her father's condition worsened. He was rushed into intensive care.

The next morning, in the early hours, he passed away. The date read: March 29, 2006. It was Dina's wedding day.

Dina looks back on that time, and is still not sure if there is a word to describe such a day in one's life.

Yes, she got married at 4 pm later in the day. (She had turned to her elder sister and mother for advice. "They told me not to cancel (the wedding). It would have been what my father wanted, they said.")

Wedding guests arrived for the ceremony that afternoon, unaware of her father's death. They were informed that the wedding ceremony had been postponed to later in the day.

This allowed time for her father's funeral to take place. At 2 pm on March 29, Dina, Johannes, her mother and eldest sister were present at the burial.

"I miss my father. I still cry," says Dina, but she will never forget the memories of the good times she shared with "her arguing buddy".