I shall take a wee wander back to my homeland of Scotland this week, not because I feel homesick or nostalgic, but rather because the suits that run the game north of the border in the UK have outdone themselves to the point of insanity this week.
Now the guys who run football in Scotland are no strangers to the strange.
The game has been going backwards for years up there thanks to dwindling crowds, Celtic and — until relatively recently — Rangers pricing everyone else out of the market, and pitiful TV revenues for clubs in comparison to the "top" leagues in Europe.
The beaks that run the game really don’t help themselves when if comes to making Scottish football a laughing stock.
They once refused the champions of the second tier — Falkirk — promotion because their stadium was too wee (don’t ask).
They also introduced the "split", where the Premier League becomes two mini leagues for the final five games of the season (don’t ask).
And they regularly organise cup matches at ridiculous times and at venues that give certain teams from a certain large city an unfair advantage at a ‘neutral’ venue.
But now they have topped the lot and given the green light to a plan that is ludicrous, unfair and downright dangerous.
The Scottish Professional Football League (SPFL) and chief executive Neil Doncaster have announced that both Scottish League Cup semi-finals will be played at Hampden on the same day, October 28.
Aberdeen meet Rangers at noon on the Sunday, before Hearts face Celtic at 7.45pm in Glasgow.
Yes, that is best buddies Celtic and Rangers, both bringing up to 40,000 fans to a stadium on the same day. Along with Aberdeen and Hearts, who, lets be fair, are the two next biggest teams in Scotland and despise both the Glasgow rivals.
Essentially this means 100,000 fans from four rival teams in the same city on the same day.
Organisers say it is “the best solution” because both Old Firm clubs have Europa League games on 25 October.
That is the biggest load of nonsense I have heard. I don’t often agree with Hearts manager Craig Levein but I’m with the big man when he says this decision is the “craziest thing”, “beyond belief” and “madness”.
Levein also offered to postpone the league game against Celtic the following week to avoid the scenario.
The former Scotland boss said: “We are actually discouraging fans to come to the game,” Levein said.
“It’s absolute madness. I just don’t understand how they can think it’s all right. It just doesn’t compute with me.
“I have got players talking to me about how disappointed their families are that they can’t come and watch their dad playing in a semi final.”
Aside from the obvious dangers involved in having tens of thousands of lubricated Scotsmen in one place — the hospitals will be busy that is a guarantee — the good name of Scottish football fans is at risk. Years if not decades have been spent getting away from the reputation of hooliganism in the game, and this is a powder keg that could easily be avoided.
And then there are the fans themselves. Who in their right mind will want to take their kids to a game on a day like this with so much potential for trouble and danger?
And how are Aberdeen fans meant to get to Glasgow for a noon kick-off on a Sunday when no train services run on that day that will get them there on time? The first train arrives 14 minutes after kick-off. Everyone drive? Sure, that’s fine ...
“This will fall fair and square at the feet of Neil Doncaster and the SPFL,” said Levein. “They made the decision to put a game on which does not suit supporters. It’s absolute madness.
“We have just told them it doesn’t suit us and Aberdeen have told them it doesn’t suit them. The Old Firm have support from all over the country so it won’t suit some of their supporters either.”
Aberdeen suggested holding the semi-finals on consecutive weekends.
That would mean postponing Hearts’ meeting with Celtic, something Levein described as “a better solution”, even if it meant giving up the advantage of playing Celtic who would be coming off the back of a European tie.
“When somebody says that the best option is option X. I assume they have looked at other options,” Levein said.
“We play Celtic the following week. Why don’t we just cancel that, reschedule it, and play that day? What’s wrong with that? Is that not the better option? It’s not too late.”
For once, the big man is right.
Hopefully the numpties in charge of the game will see the light before someone is killed.
