A guide to help support a shy child and find out if it is actually an issue

Dr Diksha Laungani explains a few tips on how to approach shyness in your child

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2 MIN READ
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Social gatherings could pose a threat to a shy child, especially if it’s a new place
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That being said, here’s a guide to supporting your shy child
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Shyness could be a personality trait. Identify the type of shyness your child is facing before labelling it as a problem
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Your child’s surroundings can play an important role, and he or she needs to be comfortable before adapting to the surrounding
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Dubai-based Educational Psychologist, Dr Diksha Laungani
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There is no particular age for a child to be shy. It always depends on biological and environment factors
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Dominant parents tend to have shy kids
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Traumatising your child can result in long-term effects and shyness could gradually turn into something more complex
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If you are shy as a parent, chances are your child will be shy too
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Dependent children struggle to adapt to their surroundings
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Children with hearing impairments or autism would find it harder to respond
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Sometimes, children choose to be quite. This is known as selective mutism
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Neglecting your child or not listening to their needs and wants could send them into a spiral of shyness
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“Pace yourself. Gradually extend your child’s social circle by getting them to take up one activity a month, or prepare them for big plans prior to the actual date by chatting with them about it in a non-threatening manner,” says Dr. Laungani.
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You can maybe say, “Say hello to auntie, she’ll be happy because she loves seeing you happy” instead of “If you say hello to auntie, I will buy you anything you want.”
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The point is to not use ‘shy’ as a derogatory term, because it would make your child feel like he or she has a problem and that’s what’s “wrong” with him or her.
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Parents themselves are good resources, so your child’s shyness could be eased out over time as they follow what you do and how you behave in a social gathering.
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Low self-esteem, confidence and self-worth could cause your child to form a shell around themselves. It could also be a problem, if your child’s shyness is bordering on social anxiety.
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Perfectionists are focused on getting things right in one go rather than doing things right in steps
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A demotivated and shy child could be a sign that it’s more than just a personality trait
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Meeting counsellors could help, and if not, then seek mental health professionals and therapists
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