GN Focus | Festive Shopping

The 12 traits of Christmas

Do you have a nagging shrew for a wife or a mum who makes Hitler look tame? Features Writer Gareth Kurt Warren and Staff Writer Vanisha Pereira help you nail the ideal gift for all personality types

  • By Gareth Kurt Warren | Vanisha Pereira
  • Published: 08:56 December 13, 2012

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  • Image Credit: Supplied

TheTechnophile

It’s always a dilemma on what to gift them. All you have picked up from their blatant hints over the past month was a Microsoft XNote Galaxy 3 and a Surface 8 MacUltrabook Pro. Neither you nor the man at the local electronic store know what you are talking about. So either pick up iPad mini (that they are guaranteed to like) or give them a gift voucher, where they can choose what they want.


The Culturalist
This is a friend who goes on about Turkish contemporary art exhibitions, crystal figurines and five-star gluten-free
Christmas meals. And as usual, you have no idea what to get them. However, if you do stumble upon a product that can be described with any of the following words — decorative, vintage, traditional or artistic — pick it up immediately. The table lamp above might just do the trick!


The Adorable Angel
Adorable angels are the perfect foil for annoying brats. These are the little ones for whom you would not mind spending anything on. You would even travel over hill and vale to find them the best present. They would love anything quaint, pretty and pink, and even if they do not,the darlings are too well mannered to say so. Even a simple videogame could bring a smile!

The Annoying Brat
This brat could be the nephew you love to hate, or any other pint-sized terror that you usually bribe to leave you alone. The best gifts for these sorts are outdoor activities, or toys and games that keep them preoccupied (and in one place) for some time. Activities are usually an ideal option so you can relax while they’re away. How about a tiring skating session?

The Bit-Part Player
These include random relatives, family friends, annoying colleagues and nosey neighbours whose absence would be a gift in itself. Fortunately, they pop up once or twice a year, but unfortunately, an OK-now-go away gift is required. You could do with last-minute gift vouchers, random gift sets and leftover presents from the year. May
be you could just present them with some table pieces such as these metallic trees!


The Strict Mum
Strict mums are those old-school sorts who would always start verbally trashing you with,“back in the day we used to…” They can be really tough so shopping for a strict mum is difficult and requires tact. Remember, you have to find a present that will tell her how much you love her and remain etched in her memory until you break the bad news of your horrible grades a few weeks later. Get her something she’ll carry, or wear, every day... may be a frame with
words that say how wonderful she is. This way you are always on her mind, in a good way!


The ‘Cool’ Boss
Note the quotes! Very few of us are lucky to have a cool boss, while others are content pretending they do. Regardless of which side of the fence you’re on, a customary gift is in order. You would have to compete with other colleagues vying for your boss’ attention, so make sure you do your best to get that promotion…erm, we mean the best present! Wouldn’t a men’s gift set be cool? Or a fresh perfume for the lady?


The Moaning Wife
We dread offering any suggestions for these, as we’re sure their men (they have our sympathies) know exactly what they want already. All you have to do is escort the wife to a store and loiter around aimlessly, until they purchase the gift themselves. However, if you decide to surprise her, make sure you save the receipt.These sorts are all about visualappeal, so an exquisite brooch or a pendant will be just right!

The Fitness Freak
Their definition of fast food is Subway (no cheese, no sauce, no red meat and wholemeal bread). An ideal option would be a gym membership for the year! However, they are not called fitness freaks for nothing and most spend a few hours a day in the gym anyway. These calorie-counting, muscle-flexing gym addicts would definitely love a new pair of trainers,wireless earphones, gym apparel or a exercise-friendly smartphone. If you can’t find anything, a 10kg bag of Protein would work fine as well!


The Laidback Dad
They’re generally older versions of the surviving caring husbands.These are the ones who wash their hands off a situation by saying, “Wait till your mother gets here.” Laidback dads would love anything that would keep them busy or even a new skill to master. Whatever it is, make sure you gift them something that will get them out of the house at least once a week.Or better still let them rest their tired backs on a comfy chair!