Toddler tantrums at 30,000 feet? A parents survival guide to handling mid-air meltdowns and a smooth flight

Two toddlers, aged four and two, and a 14-hour long flight to the US. Dubai-based Ciara Sloane took several deep breaths as she boarded. “At that moment, they were all smiles, charming fellow passengers with their laughter. But my mind was already in damage control mode, imagining their tantrums mid-flight,” reveals Sloane, adding that it was their first flight ever.

Predictably, just as the flight took off, her two-year-old began crying—uncomfortable with the seat belt and likely struggling with the change in air pressure. “She let out a huge wail, just as we were taking off. She kept clutching her ears, and I kept trying to soothe her, while my other daughter got particularly active and chatty at the time. It was chaos,” recalls Sloane.

Nevertheless, she got them to both settle down, and finally they managed to sleep for a while. But on a 14-hour flight, uninterrupted sleep was wishful thinking. Every hour, another loud wail filled the cabin,  and Sloane would hurriedly look for ways to distract her younger one. “I played around ten games of ‘I Spy’, and told them random stories too,” she says.

So as Sloane says, travelling with toddlers might be a little difficult, but with a little preparedness, you can manage. Here’s how, as parents and psychologists explain.

Stay calm and collected

Easier said than done, right? Yet your toddler feels your energy. If you panic, so do they. And they pick up on the restlessness and agitation, explains Dubai-based mum Ajitha Singh, who has two children, aged seven and five. “Take a deep breath, keep your voice soft, and let your body language communicate reassurance rather than frustration.

Address basic needs first

Tantrums often stem from hunger, fatigue, or discomfort, explains Abu Dhabi-based child therapist Maeve Nolan. “Offer a snack, hydrate them, or adjust their seat for a cosier nap. Sometimes, a simple fix does wonders.” Remember that the air pressure is deeply uncomfortable for them, she says. “During takeoff, the air pressure in the cabin rapidly changes, causing a pressure imbalance in the middle ear. We can equalise it by swallowing or yawning, but babies don’t instinctively do this, leading to discomfort or pain. That’s why they cry; it’s not just a random tantrum.”

Look for distractions

Sloane plays a ‘cloud’ game with her toddlers. She tells them to look at the sky, and see what shapes they see. “They get interested, and start imagining ice-creams, dogs, and the likes. It makes them happy.”

So, before you go for a flight, pack well: Stickers, surprise toys, or their favourite show on a tablet with headphones.

 Bring a comfort item

What item really makes your child happy? A stuffed animal, doll, blanket or in Dubai-based Trina Finn’s son’s case, it’s a stuffed, battered and torn penguin. These familiar items from home can provide a sense of safety, explains Nolan.

Play games, and tell them stories

You can play games such as ‘I spy’, or some sort of a scavenger hunt with things that they can spot inside the cabin. Once they are busy, they become less frustrated and annoyed, explains Nolan.

Pick your battles

Not everything is worth the struggle. If your toddler insists on wearing their sunglasses inside or wants to hold onto an empty snack wrapper like it’s gold, let them. Focus on diffusing the tantrum, not enforcing every rule.

Walk the aisles, if allowed

If it’s allowed, let your child walk up and down. Once they stretch their legs, it makes quite the difference, says Nolan. It breaks the tedium and they can have a slight change of scenery.

Emergency distraction!

A surprise new toy or a special snack saved for emergencies can work like magic. The novelty alone can shift their focus and calm the storm.

 Ignore the judgmental stares

There will be people who get annoyed and gives you glares. “Well, there’s not much that you can do about that, unless your toddler actively troubles them,” says Nolan.  Every parent has been there, whether they admit it or not. The glares? They don’t matter. Focus on your child and their need.

Flying with a toddler isn’t always smooth sailing, but with these strategies, you can turn a mid-air tantrum into just a small bump on the journey. And remember—this flight will end, and so will the tantrum.