Triumph over AD/HD

For most of my life, I’ve never been very efficient. I’m capable enough, but I’ve always felt I could’ve done better, were it not for my lack of consistency and inner motivation. But though I’ve often wondered why it was so difficult for me to do things that most people breeze through, I never actually got down to doing much about it, until I saw my son going down the same rocky path as me. And I knew he’d have a tough time until I pulled myself together and helped him out.

At two, my son, never a keen talker, had undergone tests to rule out the autism spectrum. He wasn’t autistic, but the paediatrician suspected ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder). There was nothing conclusive, but he was vague, careless, and had absolutely no sense of schedule.

The more I observed his symptoms, the more I became aware that I was the poster child for ADD. I was vague, careless and in my own world, too. How was I ever going to help my son, when I was so desperately in need of help myself? But depressed though I was, I had a sudden glimmer of hope. I had one big advantage — my first-hand knowledge of all his problems. And I realised that I could help him navigate pitfalls, simply by anticipating them.

I knew just how hard it was to stick to a routine. So, our days were scheduled to military perfection. Concentration was another problem. Both of us would be distracted by anything that possibly could distract — butterflies, people, our own thoughts. I didn’t want a work-around for my son — I wanted a solution. So instead of fixing an hour for each subject, we fixed shorter intervals. Our desks never faced the windows. We set short-term goals. When others set targets for a term, we set targets for a week.

Of course, it was not easy. But I had enough motivation now — I was overcoming difficulties for my son’s sake. And he found it much easier to stick to his goals with a parent fighting the same battle at his side. Together, we’ve managed to overcome our limitations, to the extent of almost forgetting them. We still face difficulties, but we know what to do to get over them. And there are compensations, too — a vivid imagination, the broad-mindedness of accepting imperfections in others, the list goes on.

I often feel that it’s quite unfair we should find life tougher than others do, but I’ve come to accept it at last. It’s difficult to overcome ADD, even the milder sort — but it can be done. All you need is patience, perseverance and prayer.

— The writer is a networking professional and a resident of Dubai for the past eight years.