In the first of the three-part series about habit and addictions, I talked about how to unpack habits, while in the second part, I articulated a six-step process to overcome an addiction. This included inner resolve and its significance in overcoming an addiction.
In this third and the final part, I will discuss about the practice of meditation to cultivate inner resolve for healing.
When you meditate every day, and/or sit with yourself every day in contemplation, start having an open conversation with yourself. The beauty and purity of self-talk will move you, and your inner guidance will start showing you the path.
HONEST SELF-CONVERSATION
When you sit in the quietness of your own company with the intention of knowing yourself, you will start to open to your own reality. This time, you are looking inward to change the outward.
You may ask in your contemplation:
• Why did I get to the point of addiction? What situation/s led me to it?
• Was there an emptiness that I was trying to fill or an escape I was looking for? (Or currently doing so?)
• What did I learn from my experience of addiction?
• Have I been able to resolve what I was looking for through addiction?
• Will I be able to resolve it in the future?
• If not, am I willing to try differently? If yes, what am I willing to try?
• If I take ‘self-connect and meditate’ route, will I be able to sort out my issues better?
• Who can understand me better?
• Can I sit and talk to myself every day for 10-15 minutes? Am I willing to put that in me?
• Am I ready for self-change or will I leave it in the middle?
• Will I try my endeavour fully or do it half-heartedly?
IMAGINATION OR REAL?
Even as you conduct the conversation with self, you can complement it every day by asking:
• Today how can I stay away from this addiction?
• Today what can I do about this behaviour that I want to quit?
Plan your day. Visualise how your ideal day would be. Remember, your imagination is way more powerful than your desire. In imagination, bring the feeling of having lived the satisfaction of your day that you’d consider ideal. If you have lived it in your imagination, bringing it in your reality is easy. Plan up to the very last detail possible, until the next day and the next.
Use the same power of imagination that motivates you to plan your holiday to a tee, or your dream project. When you want something to be successful, you bring your heart and soul to it; use the same enthusiasm to birth your ideal day, which is without addiction.
Do it because you deserve the best. Note, however, that it may take days of practice to leave the years of addiction you lived with. So, be gentle on yourself while keeping the resolve.
LIVING IN MEDITATION
Sit at an undisturbed time and place, keeping an erect spine. Take a series of deep breathes to calm your body and mind. Now, bring your awareness to your heart centre. Stay there, and one by one, start opening the doors of your heart; first, the door of love. Feel love. Then the door of kindness. Feel kindness. Open the door of forgiveness and feel forgiveness. Feel all these emotions in your body to every pore.
Now bring in people in your attention who, you have advertently or inadvertently hurt with your behaviour, including self. With love and kindness, seek forgiveness from all people (“I seek forgiveness from x.” “I forgive myself.”)
Visualise sending love to all people from your heart centre, including self (“I love x unconditionally,” “I love myself unconditionally.”)
Live the day in this vibratory feeling of love, kindness and forgiveness, mindfully.
With everyday practice, you will start feeling the essence of these emotions and as you do so, your response to situations and people will naturally be different; from the empowered state of love and kindness.
Also know that as you begin to invite changes in your life, the initial days may not come easy or pleasant. (People’s reactions, your mood swings, including anger, irritability or disorientation etc). Be patient as you negotiate new changes by rising above the blockages of anger, resentment, complaint, grudge etc.
As you meditate, feel the divine connection. Know that you are never alone on this path of change and that support and guidance is always with you. Just keeping asking for it in faith and be ready to receive with grace. Stay calm (you can affirm: “I got this.” Or “pleasure handling this”). Positivity enhances healing.
Disclaimer: Urmila Rao is a chakra balancing meditation coach, Theta Healer and a sound therapist. All the ideas expressed herein are her own and not professional advice or medical prescription. She can be reached at: milarao2018@gmail.com
