‘I don’t have the greatest self-esteem’: Emmy-winner Shefali Shah of Netflix hit Delhi Crime 3 on her biggest fear

Dubai: Just hours before Delhi Crime Season 3 were to drop on Netflix, Indian actress Shefali Shah is doing what no one expects Varthika Chaturvedi to do: she’s worrying.

The woman whose on-screen restraint has become a masterclass in quiet authority confesses she’s unsure how audiences will react this time. The National Award–winning actor's turn as DCP Vartika Chaturvedi has made her an international force — has lived with the character’s rage, restraint and breaking points.

“I know where she came from even 10 minutes ago, even a year ago,” she says — but she has no idea if viewers will see the layers she’s embedded. And it unsettles her more than any villain in the series.

“I’m terrified,” she confesses during the zoom call done just 24 hours before the new season launch.

For an actor widely considered among India’s finest, it’s an unexpected confession. Shah shrugs it off with disarming candor: “I don’t believe in myself as much as people do. I don’t have the greatest self-esteem.”

And yet, she leads one of the most decorated Indian series on the global stage. This new season brings a formidable trio beside her—Huma Qureshi, Rasika Dugal, Sayani Gupta —forming what Shah calls “easily one of the finest female ensemble casts I have seen. Phenomenal.”

The weight of Varthika

Across seasons, Varthika has become the moral center of Delhi Crime. It’s a burden Shah freely admits is overwhelming.

“People write to me saying, ‘If we had her, our city would be safer.’ That’s too big a burden to carry,” she says.

“She is flawed. She does things in certain ways which may not ring true to everyone, but that’s who she is.”

The show, she insists, works because it refuses to glamorise policing. “They’re not larger than life. Thank God,” Shah says. “They are very real. They are very raw, gritty human.”

Those realities are harsher than audiences may realise.

“My producers figured there was one constable for seven lakh people,” she recalls.

“We expect cops to protect everyone. They can’t even protect themselves.” Even bulletproof vests fail them. “Bhupinder got shot in Season Two… a basic bulletproof vest wasn’t there.”

A case that “Turns You Inside Out”

This season tackles the real-life 'Baby Falak' case—a gut-wrenching investigation involving a toddler. Shah remembers the moment director Tanuj Chopra presented two possible cases. “He said, ‘If you had a choice, which one would you pick?’ I said I would pick the Baby Falak case. It’s gut-churning. It’s impossible that this case won’t break hearts.”

But she is insistent that Delhi Crime would never exploit trauma.

“Season One proved it. The entire horrific event was not shown or shot. We came to the procedural part of it. That’s the core of DC, and that will never change.”

The darkness, however, isn’t just onscreen. While filming an interrogation scene with a young girl, Shah says she “could not stop crying.”

“Tanuj and I were like, ‘Do you have any take where I’m not crying?’ Because Varthika can’t be bawling in front of this child she’s supposed to give strength to.”

Shah’s own method is instinctual. “I give it all I have,” she says.

“I’m totally consumed by it.” But she draws a line: “Bringing a case home… I don’t think I would be able to function.”

Still, she carries the world of the show in her bones. “When I’m doing a project, I eat, drink, breathe just the project,” she says simply.

“I love what I do so much.”

A season about rage—and restraint

This season, she warns, is inward-facing.

“This season has grown bigger and outward, but Varthika has grown inward. She’s gone deeper inside.”

She worries that viewers won’t see the layers she has embedded: “I know what she’s gone through over the last one year… but will the audience be able to see that? I don’t know.”

She studies violence onscreen, even in her personal life. “I love crime thrillers and docu-dramas,” she says. “I read somewhere that if you’re a true-crime buff, you’re a sociopath. I think I am.”

But the rage is real—and shared.

“Child abuse is one thing that is so strong… castration, that’s it. No two ways about it,” she says. “Especially somebody so young.”

Cycles of trauma

The new season’s case expands into human trafficking. Shah recalls learning during research that “the mother was also trafficked. This girl was also trafficked. It’s a cycle. That’s how the show opens up.”

Her frustration is palpable. “You want to hate this person who’s caused it, but you’re also feeling like, ‘Oh my God, this is an underage kid who was handed over a baby.’”

Her experience has eerie parallels. “From Monsoon Wedding to Delhi Crime, where you’re batting for the same—child abuse—life has come full circle.”

Awards Matter. Reviews matter more.

Shah is refreshingly honest about awards. “Anybody who says it doesn’t matter is lying,” she laughs. “Maybe it doesn’t matter then, but it matters.”

But what keeps her up at night isn’t trophies.

“What I’m freaking out about the most is tomorrow morning’s reviews,” she says. “And the reactions.”

She is certain of one thing: she will never fully escape Varthika.

“The obsession of the show, I never get over.”

As the interview closes, she laughs when told she should become “the Ellen Pompeo of Grey's Anatomy on Netflix", a show which has gone past 20 seasons with her as Dr Meredith in the lead.

“Oh my God,” she says. “Please tell them.”

Don't Miss It!

Delhi Crime 3 is out on Netflix now