Aubrey Plaza opens up about husband Jeff Baena’s death: 'A giant ocean of awfulness...'

Aubrey Plaza has described her grief over the death of her husband, writer-director Jeff Baena, likening it to “a giant ocean of awfulness.”

The actor spoke about her loss on the podcast Good Hang with Amy Poehler, telling her former Parks and Recreation co-star in her most detailed public remarks to date that coping has been a daily challenge. Baena passed away in January at age 47, and his death was ruled a suicide.

“Overall, I’m here and I’m functioning,” Plaza told Poehler at the start of the interview when asked how she’s coping. “I feel really grateful to be moving through the world. I think I’m OK. But it’s like a daily struggle, obviously.”

Plaza likened her grief to a scene from the Apple TV+ horror film The Gorge, starring Miles Teller and Anya Taylor-Joy.

“Did you see that movie The Gorge?” Plaza asked Poehler. “In the movie, there’s a cliff on one side and then there’s a cliff on the other side, and there’s a gorge in between, and it’s filled with all these monster people trying to get them. And I swear when I watched it I was like, ‘That feels like what my grief is like,’ or what grief could be like … where it’s like at all times, there’s a giant ocean of awfulness that’s right there and I can see it.”

She added, “And sometimes I just want to dive into it, and just be in it, and sometimes I just look at it. And then sometimes I try to get away from it. But it’s just always there, and the monster people are trying to get me, like Miles Teller and Anya Taylor-Joy.”

Baena was a frequent collaborator with Plaza. He co-wrote David O. Russell’s 2004 film I Heart Huckabees and wrote and directed five of his own films. Plaza starred in his 2014 directorial debut, the zombie comedy Life After Beth.

After largely remaining silent since Baena’s death, Plaza is now promoting her new film, Honey Don’t!, a dark comedy from director Ethan Coen. The film stars Margaret Qualley as a private investigator looking into nefarious goings-on in Bakersfield, California.

With inputs from Associated Press