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A reader who wishes to remain anonymous asks: I am a 32-year-old man. Married last year. Actually my problem is that I'm not attracted to my wife at all. Even when she sleeps near me, I don’t feel anything.

It’s not possible for me to make love with her . I want to have children, but I don’t have any interest in my wife (actually in any girl).

My wife joined me here couple of days back and I am much stressed and I don't know what to do. She doesn’t know anything about this.

Do I need to use medicines? Should I leave her for a better future? Please advice.

Dr Raad Alkhaiat (MBChB, MRCPsych, Consultant Psychiatrist) replies: There seems to be a serious problem with your sexual function.

  1. Sexual drive and desire is lacking (libido drive).
  2. Sexual excitement and arousal lacking.

The first one is essential for the second. And both are important to complete the sexual act.

The defect you are having, as you described, have been preventing you from having not only proper sexual function but also the basic emotions required for that.

I think what you need is a complete examination and investigation, physically first. After that, it can be determined whether the issue is physical or psychological.

I don't think at this stage any medicine can help before knowing the root cause of the problem.

Remember, there is hope and there is no need to despair.

If you have questions that you would like answered by a mental health professional in the UAE, please write in to readers@gulfnews.com


Disclaimer: This blog is a conversation and is not an alternative for treatment. The recommendations and suggestions offered by our panel of psychiatrists are their own and Gulf News will not take any responsibility for the advice they provide.