Robin Sharma calls it a Pre Performance Paragraph- a short journal entry you make at 5am when you wake up. (Yes, you need to wake up at 5am to not only get a headstart to the day but also make it a happy, successful, and fulfilling one.)
‘When the rest of the world is asleep, you need to sit down and write a paragraph about the person you want to be… the person you want to become during the day,’ says the renowned writer, motivational speaker, life coach and bestselling author, best known for his The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari book series.
‘You commit to who you want to be in the day ahead, and it helps you become that person.’
I am seated with one of the most famous leadership gurus on the sidelines of the 12th annual International Governmental Communications Forum, in Sharjah. Robin has just finished addressing a packed auditorium in a session titled ‘Leading Without A Title’ helping people become the best version of themselves, when I request him for a tete-a-tete and ask him among other things, how one can be a better version of themselves.
Calm, genial and soft-spoken, and with a warm, infectious smile, Robin shows no signs of tiredness although he has just delivered an extensive, engrossing talk before doing an interview for a TV channel. How does he remain so full of energy? I wonder. He hints that it could be because of his food habits or, rather, lack of it. ‘Fasting has been incredible for me,’ he says. But more about that later.
Considered a leading global leadership and personal mastery expert, Robin has a list of clients that includes just about every major entity- from NASA, Microsoft, Nike, and Unilever to General Electric, FedEx, HP, Yale University, and PwC. He has shared platforms with such noted individuals as Richard Branson, Bill Clinton, Jack Welch and Shaquille O’Neal.
However, what left me a tad slack-jawed while researching Robin prior to the interview was seeing an endorsement by none other than another global leadership coach, award-winning scientist and doctor of integrative medicine and personal transformation Dr Deepak Chopra. ‘Robin Sharma,’ said the respected doctor, ‘has been an amazing mentor to me and is certainly a major influencer of our time.’
Influencer Robin surely is, if the legions of followers he has are any indication- 4.1m on Facebook, 1.7m on Instagram, 622k on X, and 976K on YouTube. After reading one of his books singer Taylor Swift reportedly remarked: ‘I have a lot more good days now.’
BECOMING A BETTER VERSION
While many leadership coaches talk about the importance of having a good mindset, Robin goes a step further, nay three steps further. In his book, The 5am Club, he mentions four different sets that could help make you a best version of yourself. Why four, I ask the man whose fans include the late Nobel Prize winner Desmond Tutu and rock star Jon Bon Jovi.
‘Mindset is not everything,’ says the successful lawyer turned motivational guru. ‘As human beings we’re more than our psychology. We have a mindset, of course.
‘Then we have a heart set, which is our emotionality; we experience feelings of sadness, anger, grief, elation, enthusiasm, love... We’ve got to take care of this second interior empire.’
The third ‘interior empire’ he calls the health centre. ‘This is our physicality. Without energy we can’t make our dreams come true or have a productive life.’
The fourth ‘interior empire’ is our soul set. ‘This is about our spirituality, which is really our connection to our wisdom and our natural instinct to be of service. Our soul set is our connection to our sense of wonder of the simple miracles of life.’
Although he lists the soul set last, Robin underscores that it is extremely important and one that we need to develop our spirituality. ‘I believe our soul centre, our spirituality, is our relationship to our highest self.’
According to Robin, we all have an egoist self which has developed following various experiences we have had in our life. ‘However, that is not our true self. It is restrictive, scared, selfish, and not creative.’
At our core is our heroic self- one that is loving, wise, brave, and instinctual, he says. ‘It knows who we should be with, where we should go.
‘Our spirituality is very important because it’s like a GPS that leads us to where our best self wants us to be.’
So how can one develop these sets aside from, of course, reading his bestselling The Everyday Hero Manifesto where he offers plenty of tips and lessons?
‘There are several tactics,’ says the soft-spoken coach, leaning forward to share his wisdom. ‘MVP is one.’ The letters stand for Meditation, Visualisation and Prayer.
Another is journaling. ‘It’s what I call Pre Performance Paragraph. Behavioural researchers call that a pre commitment strategy.’
Another idea he suggests to improve yourself is taking a long hard look at your social network. ‘Is it full of energy vampires?’ he asks, a faint smile playing on his face. ‘Remember, we become our conversations. So if we are around victims, complainers, trolls, negative people, their toxic beliefs and feelings will become ours.’
Robin suggests that we fill our lives and social circles with people ‘whose lives we want to be living; people who encourage us’.
I make a mental note to check out who has added me - or removed me - from their friend list.
‘First, they believe in themselves when no one believes in them until the world believes in them. They have a ridiculous amount of self-faith, even when they’re completely anonymous.
‘Second, they build heroic levels of self-discipline. Health science confirms self-discipline is not unlike a muscle. Just as you would go to a gym to build or strengthen muscles, you need to do difficult things daily to build self-discipline. Successful people have very strong levels of willpower. They get up at 5am and they follow through on their daily goals, and strive to make their tomorrows better than their todays.’ (Noticed the time? Yes, waking up at 5am is what is going to help set you apart from the others.)
‘Successful people are extraordinary innovators; they understand that the top of one mountain is the bottom of the next. So they’re always trying to get better and are innovating.
Successful people understand that health is wealth. They are well aware that physical fitness is essential to elite performance.
These people are surrounded by excellence. They understand that you become your circle of peers. So they are surrounded by- and cultivate- people who help them do amazing things.
Another point he stresses is education. ‘Education is inoculation against disruption.’ To become our best selves, he suggests reading books on psychology, positive thinking, productivity, and willpower. ‘Reading a book is like having a conversation with the author; we’re influenced by the books we read,’ he says.
I certainly am influenced by his books, and I mention to him a fascinating point he discusses in one of his books – the importance of embracing our flaws to grow. Could he expand on that?
‘Oh yes,’ he says. To illustrate the point, he shares the example of how the Japanese, for instance, use gold paste to mend a broken vase. The gold line on the vase where the two pieces are fused together ends up becoming a badge of honour of sorts even as it exemplifies the fact that the vase was once broken.
Called Kintsugi, the idea is that by embracing flaws and imperfections, you create a stronger, more beautiful piece of art. Used as a metaphor for healing, it celebrates the fact that often, in the process of mending or correcting flaws, we could actually create a more unique, beautiful and resilient individual.
‘I love that practice,’ says Robin, with a smile. ‘Also, wasn’t it Rumi who said something very powerful - that you need to keep breaking your heart over and over until it opens?’
THE STEPPING STONE TO SUCCESS
On the point of embracing flaws, failure, he says, brings a certain magic into lives. ‘Suffering is how you get strength.
‘If we’re not failing a lot, we’re not taking many risks. So, how do you grow in wisdom? In strength? In compassion? As an entrepreneur? You give yourself permission to fail more than most human beings ever would. Failure is nothing more than growth in wolf’s clothing.’
I ask him for another tip to embrace flaws- even at the risk of leaving him wondering whether I have quite a few of my own to embrace.
‘First, build awareness that our flaws make us human, make us original; build awareness that the wounds we have are because we had the courage to chase our dream,’ he says.
Some people believe work-life balance is impossible. The thing is if you believe something’s impossible, then the impossibility will become a self-fulfilling prophecy, and you won’t learn how to [correct] it or take any action to correct it.
But in our pursuit of chasing dreams, many of us end up with a poor work-life balance. How can we cultivate a better work-life balance?
‘Some people believe that it’s impossible. The thing is if you believe something’s impossible, then the impossibility will become a self-fulfilling prophecy, and you won’t learn how to [correct] it or take any action to correct it,’
Among the tactics he suggests to achieve a work-life balance is, yes, you guessed right- joining the 5am club. ‘This will get you what I call a victory hour before your day really starts,’ he says. I make a mental note to revise my morning alarm. (To become a member of the 5am club you need to follow the 20/20/20 rule - 20 minutes of exercise, 20 minutes of journaling and 20 minutes of study/reading.)
Robin also suggests having a weekly schedule. ‘Things you schedule are things you do.
‘And on that weekly schedule don’t just have a list of work-related tasks to do.’ Also include, say, three meals with the family, time for meditation sessions, time for walks in a park, time for reading a book...
Robin calls this the blueprint for a beautiful week. ‘Every morning look at your schedule and stick to it,’ he says, quoting the novelist Saul Bellow who said ‘a plan relieves you of the torment of choice’.
Another technique to achieve a work-life balance is becoming a master at setting clear boundaries- in other words, don’t say yes to every social obligation. Learn to say no when required.
Having been a leadership coach and having mentored thousands of people over the years, what are some of the major changes he has included in his life? I ask Robin, whose books have been translated into 92+ languages.
The bald, clean-shaven father of two smiles while reflecting on the question.
‘The 5am Club is central to my days,’ he says, ‘because it’s so incredibly important. I’m also on a sugar-free challenge to be more self-disciplined plus to enjoy a cleaner physical life.’
He admits he never did have a sweet tooth, ‘but I’m cleaning out much more sugar. So that’s something new’.
‘I’m doing more audio auto suggestions than I ever had because mantras are verbal prayers.’
The author and motivational expert says that of late, he has been having more conversations with people who hold beliefs that are different to his. ‘I’ve been in the leadership field as an advisor for almost 30 years and I don’t want to suffer from frozen belief syndrome [a condition where one is locked into a set of assumptions that may have been true at one time but may no longer hold].
‘The moment I think I know the truth, or the moment I stop iterating my winning formula is the beginning of the end. So I try to have conversations with people to keep me nimble and sharp, and who can challenge me.’
Is fasting a reason he is able to be nimble, sharp and ready for a challenge at any time, I ask.
‘I’m not giving medical advice but fasting has been incredible for me,’ says the 59-year-old, even as he makes it clear that people should consult their doctors before making any major changes to their diet. ‘Fasting produces BDNF [brain-derived neurotrophic factor] which increases your cognition, and I experience tremendous energy when I fast.’
A passionate advocate of fasting under supervision, he asks: ‘How can you build an amazing life if you can’t even control what you put into your body?’
He credits fasting for improving his brain function. ‘Fasting gives me incredible energy. Caloric restriction has been shown to lengthen life and I use fasting as a tool to build will-power.’
It sure has helped him succeed, and as I prepare to wind up the interview, I ask him how he would define success.
‘My definition of success is to be a humble servant to as many people as possible through my books and speeches,’ he says, listing one of the ‘elements’ of success.
Being healthy is another element. ‘Health really is wealth and a form of riches.’
‘Another is a strong family life. I think there’s zero point in being successful and ending up all alone.
‘I also find success using each day to somehow become more intimate with your personal potential. Because I think that’s a form of success - getting to know your gifts and talents.
‘I think the fifth element of success would be spotting the tiny miracles hidden inside every day. It’d be a conversation with someone over a cup of coffee, enjoying raindrops on your face, closing your eyes and relishing the scent of petrichor, or the desert breeze, relishing an aromatic cup of coffee… I’d say it’s all about practising mindfulness.’
