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Red is all over the place, in fact this hue has been in the air for more than a month now and will continue to beseech us to profess true love through exotic flowers, expensive gifts, candle-light dinners et al till the D-day!

Being a bit old school in this regard, I believe there are subtler and truer ways of showing genuine love and care, which may not be instagrammable though.

I remember a friend telling me once that she was peeved that one year, her husband had completely overlooked the existence of this day of love. She reached her work place all upset, being under the weather as well. She reached for her bag and found a flask of warm water in it. Her husband had heard her coughing all night and had put it in there for her. At that moment she realised that the humble flask held much more value to her than a thousand red roses!

Love does manifest itself in our lives not always with flamboyant romance, background music and flowing robes a la Bollywood but in quieter ways. I believe we don’t need special days to celebrate and feel loved unless we would like to contribute to the economy!

It’s heart-warming love when loved ones squeeze our hand and wordlessly let us know that they are there for us in our difficult times.

When someone gives us their undivided attention and time it makes us feel loved and valued.

Many years ago me and my friends got terribly late at work and were so busy that we hadn’t eaten anything, the whole day. My better half offered to pick us up and drop off my friends too. When he arrived he bought a whole box of sandwiches and juice, which was nothing short of a life saver for us. We devoured it like Rip Van Vinkle would have done after his twenty year nap!

Suddenly one sensible soul among us asked how had he known that we were famished. That’s when we too realised that nobody had mentioned that. He said he just had had an intuition and that’s it. I like to believe that what happened that day was born out of love and concern. Sometimes simple acts of love speak volumes louder than the best photoshopped picture.

Ages ago, I had got married and moved out of my parent’s home. After a few days I suddenly had this urge to see my mom urgently in the middle of the night. I had dreamt about her. My perplexed husband promised to take me to her in the morning and I went off to sleep fitfully. I was awakened by the incessant ringing of the doorbell the next morning and right as rain there stood my mom saying that she had this intense desire to see me!

Living an expat life, we do not always get enough time to spend with the extended family. One year after staying with my niece for some time, I was preparing to leave when the little one, with a grave expression, gave me a crumpled paper. Through my tears I could see that she had drawn a broken heart on that paper! I held on to that paper for many years.

I remember seeing a small child getting his mom’s picture to school and sneaking a look at it once in a while and feeling comforted.

Life is made up of such poignant beautiful moments and it becomes a bit of a charade when we assign a particular day for loving, friendships and so on. But again, most of us lead busy lives and might get lost in the rigmarole of life keeping deadlines, achieving targets….that we might need reminders to keep aside a day solely to spend with loved ones.

So does it matter if one isn’t given flowers, chocolates or gifts on this special day? It’s never the gifts but the thoughts which count.

Better still, love yourself and buy yourself a gift. It’s fine to be your own valentine too!

As for me, I would prefer a cup of hot black coffee on a cold morning, Valentine’s day or any other day!

Annie Mathew is an educator and writer based in Dubai.