Framing money as a tool for goals helps children develop a healthy view of finances
It's strange: Money is the one thing that most families tend to not talk about, especially in front of children.
When it’s treated like a hush-hush topic at home, children can grow up confused about how money really works, and even anxious about it. Without open chats about things like earning, saving, or budgeting, they’re left to figure it all out alone later in life, often lacking the confidence and know-how to manage their finances as adults.
For instance, someone who grows up in a home where money is always a source of tension but never really talked about. Over time, they might absorb that stress without even realising it. The anxiety builds quietly—leading to a deep-rooted fear of financial instability. As adults, they may avoid dealing with money altogether, second-guessing every purchase or feeling overwhelmed when faced with financial decisions.
Talking freely with your children
So, how much do you earn?
Dubai-based Sagar Chandan’s six-year-old son thought he was just making small talk. Why, wasn’t this question the same as asking someone about their favourite colour? Instead, the room fell silent, and he was met with disapproving glares. His aunt, sternly told him it wasn’t appropriate to ask about someone’s salary. “Later, my son, confused, asked what he did wrong,” Chandan chuckles.
Looking back, Chandan says that the children were always around when he would discuss money with his wife - whether it was the month’s budget, increments, or salary expectations. “We’ve always been open about money at home, especially during the early years when we faced several financial difficulties. So, our children would often hear us discussing job salary negotiations. The terms ‘earn’, ‘save’ and ‘budgets’ came up quite often. They assumed it was something that you can talk about with everyone.”
Like Chandan, Abu Dhabi-based Inigo Noah, an accountant, believes in having healthy, and open discussions with her children from the age of five, itself. She explains: “When parents openly talk about finances—whether it’s about budgeting, saving, or spending—they model specific attitudes toward money. If money is framed as a tool for achieving goals rather than a source of stress, children are more likely to develop a healthy, balanced view of finances.”
Noah has learnt from her own childhood experiences, where the very discussion of money generated anxiety and tension in the household. “It was a difficult time, and our parents didn’t want to tell us exactly how dire our situation was; bills were piling up and there was a dearth of savings. Yet, all I knew was that it was stressful. Owing to that anxiety, I associated finances with much fear and uncertainty as I was growing up,” she says.
As psychologists maintain: Money-related discussions often come with emotional undertones. If money is a frequent source of conflict, children may develop negative associations with it, resulting in avoidance in financial matters. On the other hand, frankness about finances can promote confidence in managing money.
Breaking the silence around money
Money is like a volume dial—it amplifies the values already present in your family, whether they’re positive or not. To ensure it boosts the right values, parents can take control of the dial and nurture a healthier connection between their kids and money by focusing on a few essential principles.
The impact of money conversations in childhood
Carolyn Yaffe, a Dubai-based cognitive behaviour therapist at Medcare Camali Clinic, explains, “The communication around money while growing up, has a profound impact on attitudes, behaviours, and emotional responses to money.”
She adds, talking—or not talking—about money during childhood plays a significant role in shaping one’s financial mindset and spending habits. Children tend to mirror their parents’ attitudes toward money; when parents model a positive, healthy relationship with finances, their children are more likely to adopt similar views and behaviours. Conversely, negative behaviours—such as secrecy or anxiety around money—can instill similar feelings of fear and insecurity in children.
Practical tips for parents
Dubai-based Aditi Gopalakrishnan’s children are quite proud of their little savings jar, that resides on the kitchen counter. “In our case, we shared with our children from the age of four itself, little ways of saving and how it diminishes when spent,” she explains, fun money games also bring a certain positivity around finances too. “They enjoy pretending storekeepers, and that, I think, helps them grasp ideas slowly about finances.”
It's these little activities and open discussions that nurture a healthier relationship with finances and building a sense of fiscal responsibility in children, adds Yaffe. It’s not just about numbers—it’s about equipping children with the mindset to manage money wisely. As they slowly move into pre-teens, you start involving them in planning family grocery budgets, or planning outings. For instance, give your child a set amount to spend on an activity, such as a trip to the movies or an amusement park, and let them manage it. Children learn best through experience.
“Through these conversations, you’re gradually instilling financial literacy, teaching them that money is a tool to achieve goals, build independence, and create security,” she adds. This steady, hands-on approach shapes self-sufficient individuals who can confidently navigate their financial future.
Similarly, Dubai-based couple Kanessa Muluneh and Remco Coerman are gradually emphasising the importance of earning money and work to their children. Muluneh laughs as she recalls how her children are starting to ask several different questions about where money comes from, and the couple never hold back from answering their questions, even if they don't keep discussing money at home. They are gradually easing them into the process, that in time, they too, will be self-sufficient and are now learning how, as Muluneh explains. "It's something that they now understand, that money needs to be earned and won't just come easily to them from us," the couple adds.
As the parents and experts explain, here are a few essential principles:
Be transparent: Deciding how much financial information to share with your children can feel like walking a tightrope. Many wealthy parents delay these conversations, unsure of how to approach the topic. A 2012 US Trust study revealed that over half of affluent parents hadn’t fully disclosed their wealth to their children, and 13 per cent hadn’t shared anything at all. The problem? This secrecy leaves children ill-prepared to handle the wealth they’ll one day inherit.
Instead, parents can take a proactive approach by introducing family values and money principles early on, tailored to the child’s age and maturity level. Topics like frugality, budgeting, saving, generosity, responsible debt use, and even financial problem-solving can be woven into everyday conversations and modeled through real-life decisions, laying a strong financial foundation for the future.
Normalise the conversations around money: One of the biggest barriers to financial literacy is the stigma around discussing money. By normalising conversations about finances, parents can help their children approach money matters with confidence rather than anxiety.
Tips:
Answer questions honestly: If your child asks about money, respond openly rather than avoiding the topic.
Encourage curiosity: Let them ask questions about how money works, from where it comes from to how it’s used.
Create a safe space: Make your home a judgment-free zone for discussing financial mistakes and lessons learned.
For instance: If you face a financial challenge, such as unexpected expenses, explain to your children how you’re adjusting the budget to manage it. This teaches them resilience and problem-solving skills in financial matters.
In the end, teaching children about money isn’t a one-time lesson. It’s a process that unfolds over time, requiring patience, honest conversations, and consistency. By weaving practical money skills into everyday life and guiding them through each financial milestone, parents lay the foundation for kids to grow into savvy, confident adults who can make smart financial choices with ease.
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