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Have your say: Why do people behave badly?

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  • Gulf News
  • Published: 19:13 November 10, 2011

  • Image Credit: GN Archive

Why do people behave badly?

Focus: Poor etiquette

  • People behave badly because it gives them a false sense of power over others.
  • Most people prefer to ignore bad behaviour than correct it and be disliked.
  • Good behaviour has more to do with social intelligence than parental guidance.
  • People are too busy to be polite.

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Comments (12)

Share your views

  1. Added 18:38 November 15, 2011

    Mood swings! Not a very valid excuse, but definitely a valid reason!

    Sujah Samson-Paul, Dubai, United Arab Emirates

  2. Added 12:25 November 15, 2011

    People behave badly when things around them dont suit as per their norms. They will act differently or he will be an anti social. other people might think that this guy is behaving badly because his attitude is not as per their standards. We should not judge them as what we see through their faces but we should see them inside their thought or their inner being. People's attitudes, character evolve through time it might be from bad to good or vice versa. People's behavior is a result of his surroundings.

    John, Dubai, United Arab Emirates

  3. Added 23:57 November 14, 2011

    In a nutshell, people behave badly because they have not learned that they must be 'The Change they Wish to See in the World'. If you repeatedly treat people badly, are abusive, ill mannered, aggressive, angry and display all those negative emotions, then that is what you will continue to attract in your life from a variation of angles. Means that there is no time for you to change, you will simply continue to be in this mode, attract others in this mode so nothing can go right for you. Even mentioning the fact this form of mannerism displays disrespect, uncultured, no regard for the next persons emotions then even mentioning it is fruitless because these forms of consciousness is non existent with an individual in this frame of mind. Something or someone must come along to make that change, or that person finds themselves in a submissive situation where they have no option but to surrender, be humble and make their wrongs right. Nothing else will change unless we come to this turning point in our lives where we start changing the things inside of ourselves. Once we do that, then everything around us starts changing and we are elevated to a higher frequency of thought, emotions, mannerisms and everything that has a 'feel good' emotion. When that happens we will wonder why we never made that change soon enough!

    Theda Muller, Dubai, United Arab Emirates

  4. Added 11:40 November 14, 2011

    A person is a total sum of his/her family, environment and the society in which they live and grow. Their disposition and the attitude clearly depict it. Earlier days there were members in the family that they can see and experience the things that nurture them to become a good citizen. But now the scenerio is totally different; how many of them have any one at home to take care and guide the children and correct them when they go wrong or feel stranded? Some of them even had good neighbours which also were a blessing in disguiuse. Youngsters when turn to peers for aide it'll surely be immature and unreasonable. Hence what we see around is an expression of 'me and mine', and selfishness.When one grows up without seeing any concern for others, such persons will never feel any concern for their fellow beings. Hurting others through words or deeds won't affect such people at all. Good manners and behaviours are imbibed in one and even in business will try with it.

    Annie R Samuel, Thiruvalla, India

  5. Added 18:37 November 13, 2011

    Some people behave badly maybe because they are short tempered or have personal problems. But that is not the way to behave. They can deal with their own problems and they can't show their anger to other people. Some people have to be more social and kind towards others. I myself have experienced this. It can be very irritating to the other people.

    Nivedya Ramesh, Sharjah, United Arab Emirates

  6. Added 22:57 November 12, 2011

    This is because of the inadequate communication between the parents and grandparents with the person concerned. In olden days the grandparents advisedeach and every grandchild in the family as to the way in which he should behave, etc. So also in olden days the family was very big. Now a days it is atom family where the parents dont have time to train their child. Both the parents will be busy in earning money. They will not correct their child when he/she shows bad behaviour. They will please their child whatever they insist irrespective of the consequences in future. It is the family setup (culture), that shapes a child's behaviour.

    V.P. Abraham, Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates

  7. Added 17:30 November 12, 2011

    Most people have had it happen: at some point in our lives we find ourselves manipulated or "guilted" into doing something we didn't want to do. We end up angry at ourselves for caving in, and resenting the other person for pressuring us. However there are other kinds of emotional manipulation covert abusive and hurtful techniques that even the most stalwart Heartless can fall prey to, that undermine a person's self-confidence, and may even make you feel like you are going crazy. The thing is, while true Heartless people would never tolerate physical abuse, they can get blindsided by emotional abuse, and not even realise it's happening -especially if it is coming from someone they trust and love. Like physical abuse, emotional abuse becomes a vicious circle that chips away at your self confidence, making it harder and harder to leave. If you are in a relationship where you have a sick sense that something is wrong, but somehow it's always Your fault, and you find yourself always trying to "fix" things.

    Ahmad Kabeer, Dharapuram, India

  8. Added 01:27 November 12, 2011

    Overall behaviour, in general, is moulded and influenced from childhood through parents, peers, social circles, etc. The etiquette and personality traits that we are inherited with (which we may not have tried to change) and the ones we acquire along the way determine the way we will behave in a certain situation. People who have been conditioned to react in a negative way when faced with a situation that might not show them in a good light, will only behave badly. It might be their way of facing the situation, of rising above their complexes or even just plain 'showing attitude', in college parlance. However, people who have grown up seeing respect being given to elders and womenfolk, who have been taught from a young age to never shout, belittle or insult another person, will instinctively react in a positive way. Therefore, why people behave badly depends on a plethora of reasons, although often times, only to be regretted retrospectively.

    Annu , Dubai, United Arab Emirates

  9. Added 22:56 November 11, 2011

    Basically it is all part of the changing perceptions in youngsters who think much beyond the reality and attempt comparing others. Some do not have the basic etiquette to be polite and following good manners in public. Some, by birth and learning from elders and observing, makes their own judgment to be fair with others around. Most people realise their bad behaviour lately. At the same time, circumstances force people to follow bad practices, which they realise very late by which time the damage could have already been happened. Learning from others behaviour and character is something people to value and conceive it in the right spirit. Today’s living environment has many formalities implied on people, but majority follows those are stated. We must know how to behave in public and how to set example to others by behaving well. A good learning practice would never ignore people’s culture as they make them more responsible to behave well where others are present. I don’t think anyone behaves badly with true intentions, but situations turn them to be even violent at certain occasions. Many are unaware of behaving well and how the basic courtesy can be expressed in public. People often conveniently ignore their bad habits, and fail to learn from others who behave well and accept in public. Some individuals do not care people talking and behaving bad, as they simply don’t care. Its just a matter of attitude. Hardly anyone takes the initiative to rectify them and guide through the right path. Parents and elders have serious roles to play in shaping up children, as behavioural challenges must be taught at the early days of their learning and development. Besides learning from school, there is so much to learn from home where parents and elders have to guide children to attempt for good learning practices when they mingle with others. In general, people must have a thoughtful approach and observation ability to learn best practices from others. It is an acceptable fact that today’s generation live in a busy ambiance; which does not mean that they are to be rude with others. There are several aspects influences people to behave uncivilised in public forums, at workplace etc. A well-mannered approach is the true reflection of individual character and resemblance of a good family background.

    Ramachandran Nair, Ruwi, Oman

  10. Added 22:55 November 11, 2011

    Basically it is all part of the changing perceptions in youngsters who think much beyond the reality and attempt comparing others. Some don't have the basic etiquette to be polite and following good manners in public. Some, by birth and learning from elders and observing, makes their own judgment to be fair with others around. Most people realise their bad behaviour later. At the same time, circumstances force people to follow bad practices, which they realise very late by which time the damage could have already happened. Learning from others behaviour and character is something people to value and conceive it in the right spirit. Today’s living environment has many formalities implied on people, but majority follows those stated. We must know how to behave in public and how to set example to others by behaving well. A good learning practice would never ignore people’s culture as they make them more responsible to behave well where others are present. I don’t think anyone behaves badly with true intentions, but situations turn them to be even violent at certain occasions. Many are unaware of behaving well and how basic courtesy can be expressed in public. People often conveniently ignore their bad habits, and fail to learn from others who behave well and accept in public. Some individuals do not care people talking and behaving bad, as they simply don’t care. Its just a matter of attitude. Hardly anyone takes the initiative to rectify them and guide through the right path. Parents and elders have serious roles to play in shaping up children, as behavioural challenges must be taught at the early days of their learning and development. Besides learning from school, there is so much to learn from home where parents and elders have to guide children to attempt for good learning practices when they mingle with others. In general, people must have a thoughtful approach and observation ability to learn best practices from others. It is an acceptable fact that today’s generation live in a busy ambiance; which does not mean that they are to be rude with others. There are several aspects influences people to behave uncivilized in public forums, at workplace etc. A well-mannered approach is the true reflection of individual character and resemblance of a good family background.

    Ramachandran Nair, Ruwi, Oman

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