Would you join a cuddle club?

What moments do you treasure in your relationship? Could it be those one-off romantic gestures or could it be the simple pleasure of snuggling up to him in front of the TV?

Cuddles are important in any successful relationship. Studies have found that when we hug each other, the chemicals released have profound physical and emotional effects.

They make us feel warm, wanted, safe and secure. In fact, after food and water, psychologists believe cuddles provide one of our most basic needs — loving human contact.

Singles on the rise
According to the New Policy Institute, London, there are almost seven million single people in England, compared with three million in 1971. That’s projected to increase to about nine million by 2021.

Perhaps this explains the rise in the hug as greeting, which has become popular in recent years.

It’s not only singletons who might be lacking in the intimacy stakes. Even those in relationships can lack affection and intimacy. Being single, I realised that what I missed most about being in a relationship was the intimacy of human touch.

Then I heard about cuddle workshops. I found one in London, run by James Lockley and Anna Nathan. The cuddle, it seems, has become currency (the class I attended cost £24 or Dh142) but nevertheless, I was intrigued. Would a paid-for hug from a stranger cut the mustard in my touch-starved world?

The three-and-a-half-hour workshop is held in a cosy room. Thirteen other cuddlers (11 women and two men) are present. We introduce ourselves — several confess to being nervous — and after a list of rules have been read out, it’s down to brass tacks.

James and Anna extol the physical and emotional benefits of cuddling. The pair claim it increases feelings of relaxation and happiness, lowers blood pressure, reduces stress levels, fights negative emotions and boosts your immune system.

Research backs this up. Scientists have found that hugging for just 20 seconds is enough to boost levels of the oxytocin hormone and maintain them throughout the day. Oxytocin makes you feel good and protects from heart disease.

But clinical psychologist Dr Glenn Wilson, while agreeing that touch releases helpful chemicals, is dubious about cuddling strangers.

“Cuddling is an expression of feeling. Hugging specifically to produce a reaction is to go about things the wrong way. Getting a kitten and petting it might have a similar calming effect,” he says. I’m with Glenn here. I don’t want to cuddle strangers. I would prefer a kitten any day.

Lonely partners
My partner, Katriona, looks on the brink of tears and says she could do with more cuddles in her life. She doesn’t elaborate apart from saying she had a tough time recently.

Janice, a mother in her fifties, is an empty nester. Her children recently left home, followed, sadly, by her partner. After confiding her feelings of loneliness to a friend, she signed up for the workshop.

We pair up for the first “gentle” exercise, taking turns to put our hands on one another’s shoulders before progressing to light shoulder-rubbing and some hair-stroking. It sounds weird but it’s comforting. It’s the platonic expression of affection I did a lot with my friends and sisters when we were all younger. I’m feeling relaxed.

The final exercise is the culmination of all our preparatory cuddles. We’re invited to form one big group hug. The group merges into a purring, giggling mass in the centre of the room. But I remain on the outskirts with a few others.

After the class, I feel warm and content but I’m not ready to join the cuddle community just yet. I can’t get over the fact that everyone was paying for their cuddles, which made the experience depressing.

“We’re not taking the time to be close to people. It’s tragic that workshops have to recreate a basic human instinct,” says psychotherapist Diana Parkinson. I agree with her.