The first rule of Celebrity Gossip Club? Question everything.
Even marriages. Even babies. And especially relationships.
As such, we submit exhibit eleven billion, two hundred thirty eight million and five: The (possible) engagement of one Nicki Minaj and her new Prince Charming, Meek Mill.
Last Wednesday, Minaj posted a picture on Instagram of a giant heart-shaped ring on that hand and that finger.
Rumors that Minaj and Mill are dating started circulating not long after the release of The Pinkprint, Minaj’s latest album. Mill appears on the track Buy A Heart.
They’ve already inspired a hashtag portmanteau: #Omeeka, based on Minaj’s real name, Onika Maraj. And while it seems quite likely that Mill and Minaj are a couple, no one is really sure yet that they’re actually engaged.
Minaj tweeted heart, diamond, and engagement ring emojis accompanying the link to her Instagram photo, but well, emojis aren’t words. In terms of solid editorial judgment, we need actual text. Way to go, Nicki. You’ve successfully ensured that no one knows quite what to think.
E! is citing an anonymous source as confirmation that the engagement is indeed real.
“Both Meek and Nicki have been spending amazing quality time together lately and have gotten extremely close these past few months,” the person reportedly said. “It may seem like it all is happening very quickly but Nicki and Meek are in this 100 [per cent]. They truly love each other.”
So until Minaj or Mill offers a solid confirmation, here are the reasons we’re viewing this possible engagement with just a leetle scepticism:
Guilty by association
Nicki Minaj is no dummy. She’s also friends with Beyonce, who is A) the queen of celebrity trolling and B) the more famous half of hip hop’s reigning power couple. She’s not shy about her admiration for Queen Bey as an artist and a businesswoman, so it wouldn’t be surprising if Minaj borrowed a page from the Book of Yonce by using her relationship with Mill to boost interest in her Pinkprint tour. Remember when those rumours of a looming Bey-Z breakup kicked into high gear? It was in the middle of their On the Run tour.
Beyonce’s father, Mathew Knowles, may be out of the loop, but he still had the good sense to recognise those rumours as a “Jedi mind trick.” Of course you’d be more likely to shell out $500 (Dh1,836) to see Beyonce and Jay Z in concert if you’re worried that it will be your last chance. Both of these women are extremely savvy when it comes to pulling stunts that keep their names on people’s lips.
Her relationship track record
Prior to Mill, Minaj was in a relationship with Safaree Samuels — often referred to in her songs as SB — for 11 years. She was fiercely private about their relationship and famously evasive when it came to questions about him. Writing for Grantland in December, Carrie Battan tried to shed some light on Minaj’s relationship with Samuels and its disintegration:
“If Taylor Swift’s records function as clues to a crossword puzzle about her own love life, Minaj’s records refuse to admit that the puzzle can be solved — or that it even exists.
“Despite her ubiquity and flash, Minaj is the single most private pop star working today, including the queen of discretion and poise, Beyonce. Nicki Minaj the pop star has kept her personal life out of the public eye so thoroughly that it’s difficult to begin to wonder how her music connects to Nicki Minaj the person.”
For Minaj to do such an about-face on guarding her private life, there’s got to be a payoff, which brings us to ...
The Pinkprint tour
Mill and Minaj are touring together and Minaj still has another 20 dates. Dangling the possibility of seeing Minaj and her maybe-fiancee may heighten the appeal for would-be ticket-buyers who are still on the fence. The Pinkprint is, frankly, kind of a depressing album, save for a couple of up-tempo tracks. It’s extremely Drake-ish, and with good reason. Minaj basically pours her heart out about the end of her relationship with Samuels on it. But who wants to go see the Mopey Heartbreak Tour? No one, judging by the muted reception to Minaj’s first single, Pills and Potions.
Conversely, people love celebrity pairings (see: Rihanna, Drake), which is why so many co-stars are encouraged to fake relationships to help support their movies. Everyone wants to see young, happy love, and Mill seems like a genuinely nice guy. And it’s easy to see what he gets out of this arrangement: a ton more people know who the heck Meek Mill is.
The great “wardrobe malfunction” hoax of 2014
Aside from Beyonce’s epic closing medley, Minaj’s “wardrobe malfunction” was the big story from the 2014 MTV Video Music Awards that everyone was talking about the next day. Minaj allegedly had to dash back on stage after a wardrobe change without enough time to zip up her dress completely. But many wondered if it had been pre-planned — TMZ claimed the same thing happened in dress rehearsal. If so, it was certainly a shrewd move and an effective one.
