Being elated when your partner has done the dishes, or becoming sad over a rumour you've heard about yourself at work are normal and even healthy reactions to the various emotions we experience during the day. Sadly, there are more negative situations and circumstances out in the world that constantly bring us down. Even worse is that most of us have trained our minds to breed the same unpleasant emotions.
Look into these easy tips to be responsible for your own happiness
Do not self-neglect
Imagine you've just had an amazing day at work and are feeling on top of the world, only to come home to see your partner grumpy about an altercation he/her had with one of his/her colleagues. Do not let those feelings take the spotlight and forget all about your own accomplishments through the day. Of course, support your partner emotionally and be there for them, but do not neglect your feelings in the process.
Similarly, when you are surrounded by people constantly sharing their insecurities around you, stop and brush it off. If you are not someone who indulges in office politics then stay away from the ones who do. This way you will not let their emotional drama pile up on you.
Silence the voices in your head
While this may seem like a no-brainer, we often entertaining negative thoughts in our minds. Stop tormenting yourself with questions that induce a sense of fear in you. Train your mind to believe things will turn out fine and that you are strong enough to face any situation that may come your way.
You cannot be happy, if a part of you is pulling you in the opposite direction. If impatience makes you anxious then concentrate on other things, go for a walk or cook a meal. Think positive and train your mind to look at challenges in an exciting way rather than something to fear.
Check the source
There are some people who are constantly complaining about life's troubles or family members who call only to talk about their hardships. Coming from a positive state of mind, you are a feeding source for them to unburden and rant. Provide them with healthy solutions, but if you see your advice is falling on deaf ears, where no action is being taken, move on.
Avoid getting yourself into scenarios that seem to suck the joy out of you. So if you know a certain person will only go on about life's unfair burdens, avoid their calls. You need to be responsible for your own happiness and mental stability first before helping the world.
Stop procrastinating
Freud once said, “We dream at night about the things we could not accomplish during the day.” If you are someone who puts things off ‘until tomorrow' or when you know you have to fill that weekly planner, but just get too lazy and binge-watch a series for five hours, only to later feel annoyed for wasting all that time then work on your patterns of procrastination.
Very often completing a task is the best joy, and if you get over that initial five seconds of boredom and dive right into it, you will find yourself feeling accomplished and proud rather than disappointed and upset.
Be impulsive
Sometimes, not thinking too much is the simplest answer to all our problems. We know this, but dwell despite.
Go out with your friends when they hit up the WhatsApp group chat with potential plans, buy those shoes as a treat for yourself, call the radio and enter that contest or go on that mini vacation this weekend. If you're waiting to strike up a conversation with that new office colleague, just make an excuse and do it!
Be impulsive to an extent that in does not harm your future decisions or give you feelings of regret. Send your old buddy a friendly 'Hi' and brighten up their day. Don't think about what they might think or what happens if they don't reciprocate. Do it for your own happiness and to make yourself feel good about reaching out to someone.
Speak up
There are many occasions where you feel something amiss, but decide to hold your tongue. It could be during a meeting, at home with family or even in a simple conversation. By doing that you dwell on it, and then regret it, making it larger than it is. If you feel the need to speak-up for your own mental satisfaction then do it.
If you are uncomfortable with confrontation, write a text or send an email. So instead of nurturing negative feelings for that flat mate who is just too loud, let them know how you feel and get the satisfaction you crave for. Chances are if you don't speak up about an issue, someone else will, leaving you with regret and a missed opportunity.
Be social
While some of you might cringe at this thought, you also might on occasion experienced how good you feel when you let go of your fears and get out there. As humans, we are social beings, we enjoy interaction and conversation. Even if it is for a coffee, but make plans after work rather than going home and diving into chores.
Enjoy the company of others and share your ideas and thoughts. It is a great way to build up some positive energy and show your personality. While happiness maybe the key to success, it is also the key to a healthier and more content you.
Also, make it a point to get out of the house on the weekends
- Sanobar Mistry is a published journalist and currently a teacher in Dubai.
