Let’s get one thing straight: There is a difference between living a quality lifestyle and meeting the expectations of your social circle. And when you focus on what quality means to you, you might be able to cut your expenses considerably, especially on things that don’t matter to you.
Parents, in particular, are often met with new and growing social expectations. From taking professional photos of the expecting mom to buying the baby a bunch of accessories that will hardly be used. And it doesn’t end there. From extra-curriculum activities to wearable technology and pocket money, parents often feel like they need to keep up with the Joneses.
Adults are not free of peer social pressure either. Almost every holiday or long weekend comes with many questions regarding “your plans.” If your plans don’t involve an exotic getaway or a fun trip, they might instantly mount to “nothing,” which overtime impacts how your value your own lifestyle.
The point is: Spend money on what matters to you. If you want to get your child an iPad, do it. If you want to travel to Asia, do it. But do whatever you choose to ensure that you live the life you want rather than the shell that is shareable on social media and water-cooler conversations.
But don’t we grow our knowledge and experience by seeing what others do? Yes, it is true that some suggestions or recommendations from others could be enlightening. You might want some encouragement to break routine weekends with new activities, find out about services or products that can help you improve your efficiency, or the like. But you must differentiate between your priorities and others. Try things, and if they don’t work for you and your budget, move on.
Understand alternatives
There is no set of rules for lifestyle requirements. Many kids get mobile phones at age 10 and many don’t. Some people choose to go on monthlong vacations and others opt for staycations. Everyone in your circle may hang out on the weekends, but it is not really a big deal if you’d rather not. With this understanding, you will be able to make budget decisions that are not merely based on compromises, but on alternatives that matche your priorities.
Alternatives also apply to activities that you want to partake. For example, if you really want on a vacation that you can’t afford, find an alternative getaway that is affordable. If you appreciate dining out, choose the frequency that work for your budget.
Say “no”
Many people get carried away with lifestyle choices that they can’t afford because they don’t want to be left out. Learning to say no when you can’t afford something, or you don’t care about it, is invaluable. This will help you live within your means. It also will help find alternative lifestyle options that fit your budget. Instead of the night out that breaks the bank, you might meet up with friends at home or watch a movie.
Living within your means doesn’t have to mean you have to miss out. It is simply creating the activities and events that help you stick to your budget. Saying “no” to what you can’t afford is the first step toward this goal.
Keep a list of wants
Focus on what you need, but your “wants” also matter. If you indulge all the time in wants, you might lose control of your budget. Instead, treat yourself to wants when your budget allows. These wants may include some aspects that help you fit in socially, if that is what you want to achieve.
In addition, coming up with your list of wants should help you define where your needs end. It is a good reflections on your priorities that will help you budget more efficiently.
The writer, a former Gulf News Business Features Editor, is a Seattle-based editor.
Where to put your money
Avoid social expectations
Pay for what matters to you
Find alternatives to what you can’t afford
Treat yourself when you can
—R. O.
