My Mother’s short sojourn with us in Dubai every two or three years is always characterised by an abundance of good food, a wonderful time of bonding with her grandchildren and a steep learning curve for me in so many diverse ways.

Her stay always leaves me marvelling at the number of minute details of my life she still points out or sets right and the several things I continue to learn and imbibe from her.

She always arrives laden with all the special treats we crave for, all painstakingly prepared by her, days in advance. Once here, she takes command over the kitchen, despite our repeated requests to relax, taking immense pride in creating wholesome, delicious meals which we all completely adore.

She continues to try her hand at new experiments in the kitchen, her love for innovations in cooking, showing few signs of waning. Each time she artistically amalgamates meat or vegetables in the most unusual combinations, the mouth-watering flavours that result rarely fail to amaze. Mum has long ago perfected the art of cooking with whatever ingredients are available, reminding me about my sister–in–law saying, “Mummy can cook with anything”.

When grandma is visiting, the bed times are never really the same for the children. Her interesting stories or anecdotes effectively narrated with all the appropriate emotions transport them magically to the way of life in their home country and are always received by peals of laughter or rapt attention.

She also cleverly uses these to educate them about their culture and imbibe the right values in that tactful way that grandparents have with their grandchildren. Sometimes she serenades them to sleep with songs that she used to sing for us when we were growing up!

From memory

She effortlessly gets accustomed to the schedule that the children follow during weekdays, keeping track of their swimming classes, music lesson or tuitions while relying only on her memory, while I struggle to cope with the help of organising boards or reminders on my mobile phone. Even at 60, she can just tap into her memory to recall phone numbers of close friends and relatives or other important information.

As for me, Mum’s visit is always a time to take a complete re–look at the way I run my life. In areas ranging from cooking to house-keeping to relationships and parenting, she points out minute details of my life, which I am, otherwise, quite capable of living, without noticing for years.

For instance, she had to actually teach me to change the duvet cover or things like detaching the lower part of the blender for more thorough cleaning. It could be as diverse as suggesting new ways to use things around the house or chastising me for not teaching the children a particular habit. Her apt advice usually helps to bring about a welcome change in my life and opens up a new perspective.

I have also been left awe-struck several times by her special brand of social networking, which works on the basis of a relationship matrix. It involves accurately tracing various intricate relationships surrounding a particular person under reference.

Soon a series of connections leading to the person in question is established through various relations or acquaintances. By the end of the exercise, the network of connections around this person begins to sound something like this — son or daughter of, married to …. And so forth.

Through this tried and tested technique, my mother has been able to keep a close track of her list of contacts and also frequently adds to it.

They say mothers are our first teachers, but they continue to be the best teachers through every stage of our life.

Even in these times when we can practically look up anything on Google or Wikipedia, one is still surprised at the number of little things that still need mothers to point out or set right through their simple advice which has been enriched by the magic of the wisdom of tradition and experience.

Fyna Ashwath is a writer based in Dubai.