In my younger days, I had many hobbies. Nothing serious. Just random collections of stamps, pressed leaves, coins, greetings cards. It was something I was proud of. There was no method or any science involved in my collections. I picked up everything I came across.
Growing up in a small village in south India, hobbies were not easy to indulge in. Take the stamp collection for example. It flourished because of the monthly posts that were delivered. The postal stamps from other countries were almost non-existent. Nobody in my family I knew lived anywhere outside the country. However, dad played an important part here. He brought in those rare ‘foreign stamps’ that came attached to his office mail. I treasured them. But, given the difficulty that stamp collection posed, we turned to, well ahem, match box cover collection. What is it, you ask? Well, we started looking for the different pictures that adorned the match boxes. I enjoyed this particular hobby. For one, they were easy to find. As we walked to school we would hopelessly search the ground, to find empty match boxes that were carelessly tossed about. I can’t remember how long these obsessions kept us busy in our childhood but they were thrilling.
Today, when I look back, I wonder what came about my prized collections. I was in great hurry to grow up, understand life, live the fantasy of an adult that, I forgot to bring along not just my stamp collection but many such small treasures that I had carefully stored in the lower shelf of the large wooden cupboard in my childhood house.
Childhood musings
As I sit down facing the challenges that life throws at me, I can’t help but think, why couldn’t I be more patient — wait and add one more to my collection — a collection of memories. No. Don’t get me wrong. It is not that I don’t remember many things. But, for all the years of my childhood spent in my village, I have but a handful of things that I remember. What if I were able to remember every single beautiful moment from those days? What if I had the ability to collect all the random fights I had with friends, the games I played and the many more things I did — into a box to play it whenever I want. What if, I were to have the indestructible black-box to store all those moments? Too many questions — but just one answer. I had no idea as a child, that, I was making the best collection of memories . All I had was a little brain, that made space for some memories and I forgot a huge chunk of my life.
My stamp collection is a lost entity to time. I don’t know, where I put them. I probably handed them over to someone. I think, my matchbox pictures were thrown away when we were moving houses. The leaves, coins, seeds, many bizarre paper cuttings, greeting cards were put away in junk. All I am left with is a faint memory of their presence in my life. If ever life were to offer me a chance, I would go back and at least keep one bit from each of my collections so that, they bring in some beautiful memory of my lost life.
As for my adult life, all I can do is to help my son Sid have the best time of his life. He doesn’t know that he is in the happiest period of his life. I can only help him savour it in ways and means he appreciates. There will come a time, when Sid will look back and wonder why he grew up so fast. I can slow it down a bit for him by creating some memories he can savour later in his life. But, if only I can find the indestructible black-box!
Sudha Subramanian is an independent journalist based in Dubai.
