Have a conversation
Parents and children do need to know where the line of freedom starts and ends ("Focus: Politics in relationships", Gulf News, December 3). Instead of judging children initially or bringing them up the way the parents want, it is better to give them the freedom to speak their minds and then discuss it. Certain things that cannot be discussed at a certain age need to be clearly mentioned to them, instead of avoiding the subject. If such a ritual or atmosphere persists in your home, surely the children will talk to you about their daily matters. Make them understand that their thoughts do matter and are always welcome. The pace at which the world moves forward is too fast and peer pressure exists [as people try] to cope with it. But, with the parents' [support], children can understand themselves better and be confident in each stride they take. It is always better to discuss, analyse and conclude matters rather than criticising.
From Ms Sathi Das
Dubai
Website comment
Working relationships
We started with parents being too strict and have moved on to parents not being strict at all — falling into the extremes is never a good thing! If parents don't let their children make mistakes and learn [from] them, children will continue to depend on them and won't be able to make their own decisions. They won't even know how to deal with the real world.
The level of freedom boys have been given, in any culture, is a lot more than the level of freedom that girls have been given. It is normal for girls to do all that they can to get their freedom, because nowadays girls and boys have the same rights and status. Parents have to assess when they act like friends and when they act as parents. The main point is to have mutual trust and respect.
The less the parents try to exercise their authority, the less they would have to yell to be heard by their children. Peer pressure has always existed and I do not think it will ever change.
Many times, the children who learn from their mistakes are far more mature than those who just listen to what their parents say. I personally do not like the parent and authority combination — it never works out and children always find a way to disobey and get into trouble.
From Ms Diya L.
Dubai
Website comment
Creative charity
Whenever I see [the] youth doing something for charity, it makes my heart melt. Gone are the days when youngsters were labelled as ‘couch potatoes' or ‘good for nothing'. Today, the situation has astonishingly changed. Youth are doing so much not only for themselves, but for the entire humanity.
Let's take the example of the Pakistan's flood victims. I was extremely happy when I saw youngsters working hard in our community. You get to tap your creativity and unleash your hidden talents. The Pakistani Youth Alliance in Canada, for example, hosted an awesome exhibition in Calgary asking all artists, painters, photographers and graphic designers to showcase their work.
It was auctioned and all the money donated to the flood victims. Youngsters got a chance to volunteer, unite, have fun and discover their artistic side. If you want to prove something to the world, go out and find ways you can creatively contribute to a charity.
These will definitely be some of the best days of your life, where you felt that you actually made a difference in the world!
From Ms Anureet Kaur
Toronto, Canada
Beauty over pain
It is true that cosmetic surgery has become common around the world ("Cosmetic surgery in vogue", Gulf News, November 27). Earlier, people who underwent surgery were those who could afford the cost. But, now many women are willing to [undergo surgery] to look good.
They are willing to take the risk just to look pretty and flawless. I asked a few women who wanted surgery and they said it was to gain confidence and respect and be praised by others. I often hear the saying "Tiis Ganda" among Filipinos — it means if you want to look beautiful, you are willing to tolerate the pain.
I am surprised that those people who earn below average also keep a part of their earnings for beauty enhancements. Some people like me who really can't [afford] it, dream of just waking up one morning, after applying a variety of creams, and being fair, look young and simply convince ourselves that we look good.
From Ms Corazon Tarcena
Dubai
Easy access to charity
I have been living in Dubai for over two decades now and it has developed in all aspects. It is a pleasure to be residing in such a magnificent city. I am fond of its cleanliness and the facilities it provides. My family has always been actively involved in charitable causes and donations.
We are of the opinion that things that are not used for more than six months should be donated or given away in charity so that it can be utilised by someone in need. Earlier, it was always a cause of concern for us to drop our unwanted items at charitable organisations.
Then, we came across a yellow box installed at many petrol stations across Dubai. These boxes serve the purpose of a used clothing bank, where one can drop unwanted clothes, bedsheets, towels, shoes or toys. I think such initiatives not only help us clear out unwanted items, but at the same time helps us serve those in need. I would like to request the concerned authorities to install such banks near residential neighbourhoods and I ask the residents to make use of this facility as much as possible.
From Ms Fatima Suhail
Dubai
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