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Off the Cuff: Life in the expat lane

My wife has been living with me in Dubai for more than nine years now and she can't speak a word of Arabic to save her life

  • By Mahmood Saberi, Senior Reporter
  • Published: 00:00 February 15, 2012
  • Gulf News

My wife has been living with me in Dubai for more than nine years now and she can't speak a word of Arabic to save her life.

Earlier, when we lived in Jeddah on the Red Sea coast she was forced to learn how to say, Kam? (how much?) because even Indians living there spoke Arabic.

But when the shopkeeper once replied, "Mia khamseen", a fight started. "He wants 15 riyals," I told her confidently, and she would go, "Really? I don't think so." And we argued loudly in front of the shop till the shopkeeper shouted, "Bar'ra", which sounded like something very rude, so we moved on to the next shop.

For years we lived in some sort of a bubble and were impervious to what's happening around us. The only thing I learned in all those years was that it was impolite to sit with your feet pointed towards your host. But I never relaxed the way the Americans do, putting their feet up on the table, so that was a useless bit of information.

The other thing I learned was that you have to shake the finjan of coffee if you didn't want any more coffee.

My wife never wanted to be an expatriate; she was very happy living in Delhi. Then she met me. Since that time has been living abroad most of her adult life. And like most Indian expatriates she has brought a large part of India with her to whichever country she has lived in. (Her only one concession to living abroad is that she loves chicken shawarma).

Like most expatriates she is tied to her work, which she brings back home and slaves over every night. Weekends are for groceries or a run to the doctor, which barely leaves her any time to learn about the customs and traditions of the country.

Though most expatriates have been to Umm Al Quwain and can easily reel out how many emirates there are in the UAE, she and I don't even know how to get to Global Village without getting lost.

But being an expert on expatriates, I have found that we all need some sort of roots to cling to when we live away from home in a strange land. It is a strange transient world; like being in some sort of a twilight zone.

Idiosyncrasies

Over the years I have found that most of my colleagues, who are also expatriates, do not trust any doctor other than their compatriots. When I told my colleague that the doctor I trust in and the one I would strongly recommend to her, is an Indian, she made a face. "Don't you know any Jordanians?" she asked.

I bring up these idiosyncrasies of expatriates because of a recent survey I read which was done by the Interior Ministry magazine 999 that showed over 70 per cent of expatriates here know nothing about the country they are living in.

Maybe some expatriates know a few Arabic words such as Habibi or Bukra Insha'allah, but beyond that it is as if they are living back home.

"It's not the fault of the expatriates or the Emiratis," said my wife when I pointed this out to her. "Everybody here live in their own enclaves," she said.

She's right to an extent. Though Dubai is home to over 200 nationalities who live and work here, not many interact with each other. The magazine points out that there are many avenues for the expatriates to learn about local customs but they are not being made use of.

But if you check expatriate websites, the most common questions being asked is, 'How much should I earn to live a decent life?' and 'How's the housing situation?'

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