Will we never manage to wash that man right out of our hair? Just when we thought that Tony Blair had been consigned to advising peppery-haired board members when his post as the Quartet's Mid-East envoy comes to an end, he pops up again like a bad penny.
According to a slew of British dailies, Blair is prepared to forego millions yet to be gleaned from his advisory roles to become the first permanent European president. Not exactly known for his altruism where cash-in-pocket is concerned, the former British Prime Minister's enthusiasm comes with a caveat. He doesn't want to waste his time chairing meetings or dealing with red tape, say his friends. He'll only consider the £200,000-a-year job if he is assigned real powers over European trade and defence.
For those of us who still shudder when we recall Blair's messianic wont to wage wars on a whistle from Washington and his propensity for blinding the public with fairy tales, this news elicits sheer horror. I would suspect that his political nemesis Gordon Brown isn't exactly cracking open the bubbly either, and while it's true that he is in a position to put the kybosh on Blair's alleged plans, such a move would paint Brown in an unflatteringly churlish light.
When asked about the possible appointment, Brown said Bair would make an excellent EU president but nobody noticed whether or not his knuckles were white at the time.
One might be forgiven for thinking that Blair's life is charmed. During his presidential-type tenure of Number Ten, he managed to weather storm after storm. Criticisms inevitably bounced off him. Attempts to oust him were doomed to failure. He was "Teflon Man" indeed. Even his timing was spot on. As soon as he made way for the chancellor to step into his shoes, Britain was beset with terrorist attacks, major floods, foot-and-mouth and economic woes.
In reality, Blair's seeming invincibility doesn't so much depend on the alignment of planets; it has more to do with his personal charm and quick wit. But even more importantly it hangs on his status as one of the boys. He's a man with connections in the corridors of international power. He's cultivated the right people. He's proffered George W. Bush a sweater not to mention thousands of British troops in Iraq and Afghanistan.
He's been anointed to hobnob with elite world leaders, bankers and captains of industry at secretive Bilderberg meetings, where foreign policy strategies are struck long before they are implemented. He's allegedly attended the annual jamboree of select movers and shakers held at California's Babylonian Grove and he's beloved by Rupert Murdoch's media empire. In contrast, Brown, who long ago lost his title as the great clunking fist, appears almost parochial.
Naturally, Blair's new presidential aspirations are being supported by another member of the "in-crowd" the newly-wed French President Nicolas Sarkozy, dubbed the neo-con with the French passport. On a range of important issues - including Iran - the Washington-worshipping duo is singing from the exact same hymn sheet.
Naturally, too, his bid is backed by the former Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, positioning himself to be come-back kid following the collapse of Romano Prodi's left-wing coalition.
According to the Daily Telegraph's Political Editor Patrick Hennessy, Tony Blair has held a council of war with some of his oldest allies over becoming the European Union's first full-time president, but is still undecided.
Fortunate
The German Chancellor Angela Merkel isn't persuaded either, which is fortunate since her blessing is a prerequisite to Blair bagging the job. It seems that Merkel's love affair with the White House has cooled in recent times. Besides cold-shouldering Blair, she has adamantly refused US demands to increase Germany's military deployment in Afghanistan. However, it may be possible that Merkel is merely playing to the domestic choir before caving on both issues when push comes to shove.
Daniel Hannan, writing in the Daily Telegraph, says he can't "suppress the unworthy suspicion that Blair has bought his candidacy" bought it with our [British] money, by surrendering the budget rebate, hard won by Britain's Iron Lady Margaret Thatcher. He goes on to say, "I do hope I'm wrong for there is a nasty word for a man who sells his country".
There's only a year to be before "Mr or Mrs Europe", whoever he or she will be starts work, and, thus, far there are only two other candidates in the running: Jean-Claude Juncker, the Prime Minister of Luxembourg, and the former Austrian chancellor Wolfgang Schüssel, said to be favoured by Germany.
Juncker, who has served two six month terms as President of the European Council, famously commented when faced with EU member in-fighting "If ridiculousness could kill, the streets of Brussels would be piled high with dead bodies". The appointment of Blair to Europe's top job would surely set a new standard for ridiculousness. Bush's man running Europe is not only ridiculous, it's tantamount to a crime. Better he sticks to writing his memoirs, lending his name to corporations, and touring the talk circuits where can do no more harm.
Linda S. Heard is a specialist writer on Middle East affairs. She can be contacted at lheard@gulfnews.com.
