Abu Dhabi: In a country where more than 200 nationalities co-exist and co-mingle, dining etiquette acquires nuances that go beyond one’s own cultural preferences.
Marianne Saulwick |
This inter-reliant cultural diversity leads to a heightened awareness and appreciation of different peoples and how they approach the ritual of eating and sharing. “It’s about keeping groups of people together and understanding that each culture has a certain way to encourage and manage the sharing of food as an essential foundation,” says Marianne Saulwick, director of industry liaison and professional development at The Emirates Academy of Hospitality Management.
Dining etiquette, at a get-together that has representatives from different cultures, is an amalgamating rather than a differentiating process. “We also have to consider ... that each culture has developed its own set of rules around the sharing of food,” said Saulwick.
While some of the rules might have changed, it is always essential to make a favourable impression and show courtesy to your dining companions, Saulwick said.
However, there is a difference between dining etiquette and table manners, she said.
“Dining etiquette is the broader picture which is designed to ensure that people behave consistently and within the norms of politeness,” Saulwick explained. “Table manners is the application of the rules of etiquette used while eating, which may include where to place your napkin, when to leave the table, how to eat a certain dish,” she clarified.
“The rules around dining etiquette... mainly [are about] not offending others and being courteous and considerate at the dinner table because it’s all about offering to others, whether it’s food or gratitude.”
Table manners, on the other hand, are the visible signals of the state of our manners, she informed.
Different cultures have different set of rules as table manners, she added.
“The norms across cultures are an important sign of national identity and source of pride, and such traditions vary across cultures, where they can be strongly perceived and practised within communities, such as in the Arabic and Japanese cultures where it’s common to eat from a communal platter. However, in the modern world, different cultures tend to acclimatise, take cue and follow suit from the environment or context they are in. There’s a shift and much more tolerance now. In fact, people crave for that and celebrate differences; and despite the pervading influence of Western culture, people seek out authentic experiences. For instance, if you’re dining at an Ethiopian restaurant, you would use injera bread with your hands to mop up the wet dishes, it would be inappropriate to ask for a fork and knife,” Saulwick said.
There are many cultures wherein being seated on the floor and having a communal meal is the norm. “Despite it being uncommon in the West, in some cultures people eat with their hands and it’s normal. It’s unfortunate that some people are close-minded and have fixed opinions or assumptions about norms that do not follow theirs,” she said.
On the all-too fragile subject of not knowing what to do in a different cultural context, Saulwick said, it is matter of keeping an open mind and not being judgemental.
“People should appreciate other cultures and value diversity of mankind. We cannot dictate etiquette, we can educate people who are unfamiliar with the prevailing eating local customs, so that they feel comfortable and enjoy themselves when having the opportunity to access other cultures, by learning, informing and exploring diverse cultures. They need to be aware that people might judge or comment initially, if mistakes are committed — [but that’s] alright, because we’re learning about other cultures. But most importantly, we have to come with an open, tolerant and flexible approach, and learn to adapt to the best.”
A good way in any setting is to have a keen eye and observe what others around you are doing. “As a rule of the thumb, look at the host and their local culture’s gestures, and follow by example,” Saulwick said.
She added, “I recall once being invited to an Emirati house and they kept serving me Arabic coffee. I kept drinking the coffee until I could not sip anymore. I was unaware that I had to shake the cup from side to side telling the host I don’t want anymore.”
Saulwick also pointed out the general rules of dining etiquette, irrespective of culture: “Always be considerate and courteous to people including those serving you, and respect, appreciate and acknowledge their care and effort, using the words ‘Please’ and ‘Thank you’.
Citizens of different nationalities shared with us some of their own dining cultural protocol and conduct, including table dos and don’ts that vary in cross-cultural dining etiquette.
(Asma Samir is a freelance writer based in Abu Dhabi)
