Not many people consider bullying to be a criminal act, but ask a victim about it and you might be surprised with the scars they carry within.
In every case someone needs to be held accountable. Gulf News readers debate on where the buck stops - is it the parents or the teachers?
Lakshmi Nandakumar, a middle school teacher residing in Sharjah, said that the responsibility lies with both parents and teachers.
She said: “It has to be a complete effort from both sides.”
While it is important for parents to play an active role in their child’s life, teachers also need to know every student and their characteristics.
Nandakumar, an Indian national, said: “If a student doesn’t have a place to let out their frustration then they might vent out in more aggressive ways.”
Many of Nandakumar’s students speak to her about issues they face and she noticed that they tend to be more peaceful around others when they know that someone is there to listen.
Mourad Lassoued, a Tunisian middle school teacher, agrees with Nandakumar that both the family and the educators should be held accountable.
However, he also believes that children are also to blame.
Lassoued, an Al Ain resident, said: “The child should be part of the solution and not the problem. The child is the one who is hurting others.”
Lassoued added that if violent behaviour is noticed in the child then everyone should get together and resolve it.
As a teacher, Lassoued noticed that not many parents are informed of their children’s activities.
He said: “Parents need to ask for updates and get feedback from teachers and social workers. Just like wings, parents and teachers need to work together to succeed.”
Fadi Beydoun, a Canadian national and father of three, believes that the responsibility lies solely with the school.
According to Beydoun, an HR director living in Dubai, some students are not afraid of the school’s penal system.
He said: “I have experienced this in parent-teacher conferences where the school has said that they could not discipline the bully because his or her parents would create a problem.”
This lack of discipline will encourage such bullies to act aggressively as it gives them more power and Beydoun believes that this is part of the problem.
On the other hand, he said that parents need to accept the school’s standard of conduct if they want to enrol their children there.
Maria Casanada, a mother of three residing in Abu Dhabi, said that it is the parents’ responsibility.
She said: “The parents or guardians are the ones who are raising the children, so, of course, it is their duty to teach them right from wrong.”
However, Casanada, a Filipina executive secretary in a medical centre, believes that it is a difficult job as children are easily influenced by the environment around them.
She said: “I see many mothers trying hard to educate their children but they still act in inappropriate or violent ways, so you can’t point the finger at them all the time – each case needs to be investigated.”
According to Rema Menon, founder of Counselling Point, one of the reasons why children tend to head towards bullying is because of their overly permissive parents who do not set clear boundaries of acceptable behaviour, which in turn may give the wrong signals.
She said: “Those children or young adults who lack supervision or are physically punished all the time may consider it acceptable behaviour and may also display such behaviours towards others.”
However, Menon pointed out that parents’, teachers’ or friends’ involvement can prevent incidents of bullying.
Menon said: “Whether a parent, teacher, babysitter, tutor, maid or caregiver, we need to be sensitive to the needs of the children entrusted in our care.”
