How much should age define a person?

Does age guarantee respect? Or is it character that matters? Are ageing parents expected to care for themselves? What about in the workforce, does age affect ability?

This week, we asked readers to share their views on the dynamics of old age in society, family, and the workplace. 

Reversal
More to ageism than we think

Ageism goes both ways. By default, we assume it to be applied to those who are reaching retirement age or older, but ageism is very much present on the other end of the spectrum as well. If you ask many young pepople, they would provide anecdotes of instances when they experienced ageism in the workplace or even at home. The prevalent viewpoint (especially in different workplaces) is that experience increases with age, and that a person who is young may not have opinions or viewpoints that are as valid as their older counterparts. This, however, couldn’t be further from the truth. In the same way that people are encouraged to let go of their prejudices and see older people as capable human beings, concerted efforts should be made to understand that age does not automatically translate to, and is not directly proportionate to, experience or wisdom. Intelligence, creative thinking, and the ability to come up with alternative solutions often have nothing to do with age. I believe that a major way to ensure today’s youth take on more responsibility and become better citizens is to believe in their abilities and capabilities, and give them a chance to exercise those abilities and put them to good use. In the past decade, youth have been at the helm of technological developments. With the increased usage and importance of technology, especially how it advances daily life, the youth have an advantage. I believe that this trend will slowly eradicate the ‘reverse ageism’ that still tends to persist in society.

From Ms Sidiqa Suhail
Managing director at a bakery in Dubai

Family
Different ways to deal

Everyone deserves their due respect, no matter what their age. Dealing with older people, however, plays out differently with each facet of our lives, including family and work.

I think in society here in Dubai, there is respect given to the elderly. However, I get to see it less and less every day. Take just one trip on a Metro ride, and you will know what I mean. The way the elderly are treated is horrible. Eyes are averted or people pretend to be asleep when an elderly person beckons over for a seat. It’s really a selfish attitude to have.

When it comes to family dynamics, I believe that if children were looked after well in their younger days, then as an adult, they have some sort of a ‘moral obligation’ to take care of their ageing parents. Understandably, not everyone has the kind of income to financially support several family members. Thus, the degree of support should be considered on a need-by-need basis. One helps when one can. Parents also should know when to draw the line. They shouldn’t blindly depend on their children the whole time. They should have a proper retirement plan and savings in place.

There are times, however, when relationships are strained, even though both the parties have tried to work it out. In that case, I don’t think the children need to be bound by an ‘obligation’. You do things because you want to, not just because you have to or someone sent you on a guilt-trip. Even if it’s your parents.

As for older people in the workforce, age doesn’t matter in terms of working, unless it’s physically demanding. If a person is past retirement age and has sound mental and physical health, why not? For people over 65, there is definitely a space in the workforce in terms of providing expertise. Technology may change, but I think dealing with people hasn’t.

From Ms Aneesha Rai
Content editor for a real estate company based in Dubai

Experience
Older people offer expertise

Nowadays, there is a disconnect between older people and young people. There are so many distractions, particularly in the form of social media, which are drawing family members away from each other. You can see it at dining tables, where family members don’t even speak to each other; they’re just looking at their phones. Within families, there is no effort from younger members to interact with older ones. In that sense, the respect for elders has eroded a bit.

When it comes to the workforce, however, it is a different story. Based on personal experience, I’ve never faced a professional problem because of my age. As a working 69-year-old, I find that my co-workers look to me for advice and lessons. Because what they want to achieve, I’ve already achieved. So, I’m able to share my views and teach them in a proper way. This is why I think 60 is too young for retirement. Work actually boosts health, because you’re active and have purpose. Your mind is also at work. When you just stay at home with nothing to do, you are more vulnerable to falling ill or you might get lethargic.

While it’s true that technology can be a big challenge for older people, it should not be used against them when it comes to work. There are some older people who can keep up with the advancements, but others do not adapt as quickly. It’s important to note that expertise and technological adeptness are not the same. Just because someone can work with technology, doesn’t mean he or she has the expertise to guide people. These are two separate things. Expertise is achieved through experience and hard work, and being a few years older can help with that.

From Mr Ebrahim Tily
Financial consultant based in Sharjah

Attitudes
Age is just a number

Of course society still values older people, but not in the traditional way. It’s not the usual opening doors style, but rather, society has come to accept that older people can still be independent and full of life. In other words, being old is no longer equated to being weak. Nowadays, we see older people who are breaking away from the stereotypical vulnerable figures of the past. There’s even something called the ‘World Senior Games’, which is like the Olympics for those 55 and older. That’s because older people don’t like being made to feel old. They have a renewed zest for life. They want to go out, have a good time and be active. And the youth have come to respect that. In fact, a recent study has revealed that older people tend be happier and more satisfied than their younger counterparts, because they’re less burdened by career pressure and peer pressure.

Even technology is not just for young people. It’s a stereotype to think that older people can’t adjust. If a baby can learn to use an iPad, why can’t a grown man? The big tech geeks of the world, like Bill Gates and Tim Cook, are over the age of 55. No one would dare say they don’t understand technology.

Additionally, developed countries have made great strides to protect the rights of senior citizens, from medical benefits, like Medicaid in the USA, to anti-discrimination laws. These developments have cut down on ageist practices, and have enabled older people to stand up for their rights. To me, this shows that while ageism may still exist in some pockets of society, the overall trend is towards a more equal treatment of young and old.

We all know we’re going to get to ‘old age’ someday. No one’s idea of retirement or old life is sitting on a park bench and looking after grandchildren. Not anymore, at least. I’m sure people in their 20s and 30s want to roam the world and take on new adventures when they hit retirement age. I love that attitude. It’s that attitude that’s diminishing ageism. After all, age is just a number, right?

From Ms Vanessa Furtado
Copywriter based in Dubai