Love is usually misunderstood. People think it is something that has to be acquired from outside by us. This is what underlies the habit of craving attention and acceptance from others. It means depression is expected when we do not always get what we want from others. Love is confused, as well, with the attachment. But if we were just a little self-aware when becoming attached to anything (or anyone) that is changeable or perishable, we would notice that the emotion of fear rises — fear of loss or damage. And fear is the opposite of love. Actually, it is fear that chases love away. That is also why we are all completely responsible for the creation of our own stress.
The first sign that love is absent in a relationship is usually when we get irritated with the others when they do not meet our expectations or desires.
This irritation might grow into frustration, and frustration into anger. Anger is the emotion behind all conflict and, ultimately, violence. Unfortunately, most people have learned to believe that anger is part of being in a relationship. Actually, anger is a sign that we have lost the control on our mind and our connection with our inner peace and inner power, which is the true nature of all human beings.
When we reconnect with our inner self, toward the source of love, freeing our self from the dependence and the expectations from outside, only then can we feel contentment. Only then are we able to share with others a pure feeling — unconditional love.
— The reader is a human resources lecturer and writer
