Opinion | Speak Your Mind

Focus: Jealousy

When it comes to emotions, jealousy is probably the most complex. We all have been subjected to some levels of envy and jealousy, either from siblings, extended family or colleagues. But the shade of green is probably the most difficult to respond to in the spectrum of emotions. This week, we talk about what drives jealousy and if you are the subject of someone’s envy, what is the best way to respond. Post your thoughts on our Facebook page ‘Gulf News Al Nisr Publishing UAE’ or at readers@gulfnews.com

  • By Huda Tabrez, Community Web Editor
  • Published: 17:32 September 21, 2012
  • Gulf News

  • Image Credit: Ramachandra Babu/©Gulf News
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15:35 Gulf News: At the heart of envy is failure.

15:40 Lodhi Azmat Allah:. I agree with the statement. People cannot see others getting ahead. Usually this happens between two friends and two colleagues. As they stay together they enjoy each other’s company but at the professional level if one gets ahead, then they have a feeling of jealousy between them.

15:43 Lakshmi Ajay: Not necessarily. There can be positive envy and at the same time negative envy. While positive envy – envy caused by healthy competition – can make us work harder and achieve more, negative envy can lead to a fall.

15:44 Apoorva Arya: It is human nature. And jealousy can actually motivate them to perform better! But the major problem is when it starts ruling our lives, and drains out all our motivation to work harder.

15:44 Rohan Kapur: Jealousy is in every person - in people of different ages at different stages of their lives and we should feel really happy that the person who is jealous of you agrees that you are superior. Jealousy is actually good sometimes, too, because if there was no jealousy, there would be no healthy competition in the world.

15:52 Gautham Manoj: It’s just like “the chicken or the egg” paradox: Jealousy causes failure and further failure causes an inferiority complex and more jealousy!

15:52 Gulf News: Selfish capitalism has made avarice into a virtue.

15:54 Pooja Vishwanathan: Jealousy is natural and is very common. Sometimes, it’s responsible for giving an individual the drive to strive and work hard. However, it often leads to bad behaviour like gossiping or bullying or pulling down a more successful party or individual.

15:57 Akshaya Parthasarathy: It’s a bit of both. You cannot pin-point the source of jealousy. It can be a feeling of inferiority, or how today’s generation cannot even master their emotions over petty things like banter. People just want to be at the top, and fail to realise that there is more than just one place.

16:01 Rahil Khan: Selfish capitalism, no doubt, has motivated envy and jealousy in society. At a positive level, this selfish capitalism has started revolutions but when it comes to virtue, our talent, selfless emotions, honesty and many more qualities of life have been dissolved. Now the whole focus of individuals is to get what he or she doesn’t have.

16:05 Lakshmi Ajay: Today’s society is all about how much money you are worth. In this rat race to win the golden trophy of success, people go to great extents. And the jealousy or the inferiority caused by wealth another has obtained has reduced humankind into a pitiable condition.

16:05 Rohit Reni Eapen: In this world, everyone has his or her own perception. If we have a bad self-image or don’t think highly of ourselves, then our perception is corrupt.

16:07 Hannah John: Jealousy, at times, causes problems because if we are competing with an individual, we fight on till we meet our goal. But once we fail, we feel that we have gone down completely. Because of jealousy, we at times place bets for winning against someone, just to show that we are superior. This is really common in schools.

16:09 Gulf News: Being good is no guarantee that people will be decent with you.

16:12 Rahil Khan: Frankly, it is tough and not everyone’s cup of tea to be good with the person who is not good with you. But ignoring bad behaviour is the best tool to subside it.

16:15 Lakshmi Ajay: Human psychology is one of the strangest forms of science ever studied. Decency certainly cannot guarantee decency. The give-and-take policy has changed. In today’s world, one has to learn to stand up for oneself and not let anyone else bring you down.

16:16 Pooja Vishwanathan: Often people are jealous because they suffer from an inferiority complex. The best way to respond to jealousy is to simply ignore it and keep giving your best. Goodness often works with jealous people because not giving them a reaction is the best way to indicate that you are unaffected and your spirits are still up. One needs to take action, only when bad behaviour, stemmed out of jealousy, gets out of control.

16:16 Hannah John: Be aware that your thoughts can happen so quickly that you don’t even realise consciously that you’ve had a negative thought. Developing greater awareness of your thoughts and what triggers them is a large part of tackling the problem.

16:17 Apoorva Arya: I’ve been jealous many times - but because I admire something in people which I wish I had. And then, with a positive attitude towards life, try to improve upon yourself. I always say, the biggest competitor you have, is you, yourself. So, see life with a positive attitude at all times!

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