15:18 Gulf News: Men are capable of vindictive hate, while women are not.
15:19 Sandhya Shetty: While I do agree that men carry hatred to their graves and that women generally tend to forgive and forget, it all boils down to personality traits. It’s all about how an individual behaves with one another in a certain situation and not about which gender you belong to.
15:20 Tayeba Hussain: I agree. If you look at the bigger picture you will see that it is men who have always had this power struggle, an irrational need to have power and control over the world and society. The society that we live in has been shaped mostly by men and misogynists so that women never get the upper hand. Women need to stay at home and take care of children. Superman, Batman, Spiderman and Catwoman were all created to make women believe that they are weaker and should stay at home. That way men would have less ‘beings’ to compete with.
15:24 Sandhya Shetty: I partially disagree. Whilst women were branded to be homemakers, historically there have been women in power. We are discussing something that has nothing to do with gender.
15:35 Tayeba Hussain: Sandhya, while you and I may have come across a few competitive, aggressive or vindictive women in life, all men are generally aggressive, chauvinistic and sadistic. We experience their rage and tantrums on a daily basis. By default, what we as women do is unimportant and easy while what they do is an accomplishment. Yet you can’t get them to boil an egg for themselves.
15:27 Sandhya Shetty: I guess the way we are brought up plays an important role. While I am a full-time working mother, I know people who disagree regarding this matter as this would imply that the woman is superior to the man but in the end it’s all about giving space to each other.
15:34 Gulf News: Men are more likely to feel threatened by their partner’s professional success.
15:37 Tayeba Hussain: You cannot generalise and with time men are more tolerant of their partners working and having careers. Having said that, there is a huge part of society that still has difficulty accepting a career-oriented woman as girls all over the world are still struggling to go to school and have jobs. This is because our society is dominated by men who cannot accept women competing with them. Society makes men believe that his role is to be the breadwinner of the family. While most men would be okay with women earning enough to help them in an insignificant way, the moment the woman starts to have a bigger share in that role, men feel threatened and insecure. Let’s just face it, while we women can be better breadwinners they can never be better homemakers! Leave them with your children for one day and they will end up having a power struggle with them, too!
15:42 Sandhya Shetty: Why should the man feel threatened when it is for his own family’s good? If I am doing well and my husband wants to take a break from his job, he can consult me and take a break. How many men can think of doing this, especially when they have the pressure to take care of the whole family, including a wife who does not work? My mother has been a housewife throughout her life and I am probably the only girl in the family who has decided to pursue a career, despite having three children. This is because that is how I was brought up by my parents.
15:46 Tayeba Hussain: But those are idealistic situations, Sandhya. In reality, there are a lot more dysfunctional households and it is mostly the woman who suffers.
