Don't forget mothers-in-law

Mother's Day came and went quietly in our household. None of us went crazy trying to rush to the store to purchase something cute for the lady of the house. My sons, when they were younger, would spend hours on the computer making a card that said, ‘Thank you for being a good mother', or something very dishonest like that.

Whenever Mother's Day came along, the poor guys were made to suffer by their teachers. They were asked to cut out plastic flowers or a tea kettle with soppy messages like, ‘On this Mother's Day as you brew your tea, I will be thinking of you …'

I am complaining because my role as a father has never been recognised, even though I stand behind my wife on parent-teachers day and grin sheepishly while she argues with teachers on why our sons should be given better grades.

On Father's Day, realising that I feel ignored, my wife bought me a tiny bear holding an empty wallet and peeking out of a shopping basket. It carried the words: ‘A father is someone who carries photos where his money used to be'.

People can be cruel, even those who know you intimately.

My mother-in-law called up my wife to complain that she did not call her to wish her Happy Mother's Day. My wife replied that her mother should have called her since she is also a mother. I decided to quietly creep out of the room, but later I wondered why there is no day that celebrates the joys of having a mother-in-law.

Researching on the internet, I found that there is indeed a Mother-in-Law Day. According to a greeting card website, Mother-in-Law Day is celebrated on the fourth Sunday in October. (That gives all of us enough time to plan and get out of town or lose our mobile phones.)

‘This tradition began on January 23, 2002. It is similar to Mother's Day in that it is a day to celebrate motherhood. See also Mother's Day …' said the website, not explaining who in their right mind would have thought up this ‘day', which this year, mark your calendars, will fall on October 28.

Sweet misfortune

I wish I could show you some of the cards being advertised for the day; they are mostly cheerful and have colourful flowers. There is also one showing middle-aged faces — white, black and brown — with various hair-dos, and all smiling sweetly!

There is one card showing a pretty garden scene and in front is a tiny table on which is a teapot and … a single cup!

The last time my mother-in-law visited us in Dubai, I shared the story of my misfortune with my colleagues. They commiserated with me and said the dark days would soon pass. None of them had met my mother-in-law. They did not know what a sweet-natured person she could be.

My mother-in-law drinks tea — umpteen cups a day — but she hates those tea bags which make everyone's lives easier. It has to be fresh tea leaves brewed in a pot and filtered with a silver strainer.

Washing the pot takes hours and you have to reach in the pot and pick out all the tea leaves and your fist gets stuck inside ... but I digress. I once had a cup of tea with her and it tasted like sweet turpentine.

A survey done by a magazine showed that people would rather spend the day doing boring household chores as scrubbing, waxing, dusting and washing than spend a day with their mother-in-law.

A large percentage of those folks said they wouldn't go to the woman who raised their spouse for any marital advice. But there's good news, a large number said there was one thing they would trust her with: watch over their kids.