The art of greeting has several forms, depending on where you live. In many countries the shaking of hands is the standard gesture. One often judges a person by the intensity of the clasp, dismissing one that is limp as indicative of character and impressed by that which is firm.
Sometimes this art can be taken to an extreme, judging by a recent newspaper report. A US attorney was charged with assault for allegedly shaking the hand of a federal prosecutor so hard that it injured the latter's shoulder. The aggressive act, which was described as almost ripping off the arm in question out of its socket, ended in the arrest of the so-called assaulter. So, there is a lesson to be learnt here. While greeting someone, ensure that you receive the hand in question with the utmost care. However, avoid the possibility of being labelled a wimp for exerting too little pressure. Too little and you're liable to be dubbed as characterless, too much and you face the prospect of charges being levelled against you. There is no intention here on the part of the writer to scare you into thinking twice before resorting to this method of saying hello. Just remember the secret lies in the exactness of the pressure.
Speaking of welcomes, a recent holiday in Spain found me bestowing endless kisses in the air after every introduction, a rather tiring exercise when confronted, for example, by all the members of the village choir, none of whom knew a word of English. So the niceties were observed meticulously by me as I mouthed Ola in between kisses. Since the choir comprises a total of about two dozen members, that came up to 48 cheeks proferred for my attention. By the time the time-honoured ritual was completed, I looked around for a chair into which I hastily collapsed. Greeting, I learnt, can be an exhausting experience.
But I consoled myself with the fact that I was not some place which required the rubbing together of noses or where it is considered polite to stick your tongue out at someone to show you have no evil thoughts! If one is a frequent traveller, one could get not just one's time zones mixed up but also the correct form of greeting strangers. Such a lapse could prove costly, not to mention embarrassing.
With globalisation and multinational companies relocating or opening branches in what are now regarded as booming economies, a need is seen to help people adjust to the new culture and environment they may find themselves in. So, there are training programmes to familiarise employees with what is considered correct behaviour in foreign lands. These classes are meant to prevent the committing of social gaffes and instill an appreciation of a different way of life.
Apart from the physical aspect of greetings, there is also a verbal response. Taking the trouble of learning the right cue is a surefire way of endearing oneself to the person being introduced. It says a lot about you. You have taken the trouble of learning a foreign phrases and have used it appropriately.
Pronunciation doesn't really matter. It's the thought that counts. But a word of warning here. Make sure you use the right phrase at the right time. Learning a foreign tongue isn't an easy exercise unless of course you have a natural bent for such things. You might have mastered a few sentences after great effort and practice. But when the time comes to use these in everyday situations, it is not uncommon to be confused as the words you seek remain elusive and you find yourself mouthing something that is absolutely irrelevant.
In the long list of things to be wary of when trying to traverse unfamiliar landscape, there is one more to watch out for. If you happen to possess the kind of friends with a warped sense of humour, beware of what might seem good intentions. In this case, their offer to teach you a language new to you. The mouth of this gift horse must be peered into until one is satisfied no danger lurks within.
