Back to the future...

The DeLorean car was produced briefly between 1981 and 1982 in a car plant in Belfast — then one of the most violent and economically depressed cities in the world. Northern Ireland has a history of light engineering — the ill-fated Titanic was build in the city’s shipyards and it sun on its maiden voyage in April 1912. John DeLorean, a brilliant car designer with a history of award-winning models behind him at General Motor’s Pontiac division, received £100 million (Dh580 million) from the Northern Ireland Development Agency to build the car there. He might as well stayed at home.

The gull-winged vehicle leaked, was grossly underpowered, had bits borrowed from other cars, and was a disaster. Just 6,500 were produced — and are probably more famous now simply because the cars were so bad, one was used in Back to the Future as a time machine.

Edsel who?

If you’re going to develop a family car that could take on General Motors, don’t name it after an obscure uncle. Ford learnt this lesson only after three disastrous years of producing the Ford Edsel between 1958 and 1960. Never mid that it look like a boat — and drove like one too — it was big with lots of chrome . Except that Americans wanted hot rod style models just like the ones they saw Hollywood stars drive. Market research never got it so wrong. Uncle Edsel was sent to the retirement home after the cars were left parked on sales lots. Oops!

What’s new is old again.

Based in Atlanta, Georgian, the Coca Cola Corporation typifies American capitalism at it’s best. And worst. Don’t mention New Coke. In April 1985, New Coke was launched — new formula, new taste. But consumers were confused — and they liked the old Coke just the way it was. And if this New Coke is new, then there’s got to be something wrong with the old Coke, and they stopped drinking both. A marketing disaster. New Coke was cancelled within two months, And that $100 million spend on marketing it? Chalk it up to a learning experience. Just a bad one.
Please press pause

While the VHS cassette tape is a thing of the past, Sony’s version of video tape machines for the home hardly made it out of the starting block. Sony Betamax hit the market in 1980 and was bulky, awkward to use, required a machine as big as a suitcase to use, and had the annoying habit of chewing up the 3cm wide take and turning it into a bundle of spaghetti. It last two years — about 24 months too long.

Lasers on stun...

If you’ve ever watched a movie at home, you know just how compacts a Compact Disc actually is. But imagine a laser disc as large as a dinner plate that held only half of a movie? Touted as the next best thing when launched in the mid 1980s, it never caught on — thankfully. They were too big, too bulky, too slow and contained too little information. But if you have two of them, you can use them as really big ear ring loops.

A rotten Apple.

It’s hard to believe that Steve Jobs didn’t always get it right, that he could make mistakes and that there were some product launches that were brutal. Enter the Apple Newton. No, it wasn’t a computer and it wasn’t a phone and you couldn’t play music on it. And yes, you needed a stylus pen to use its little digital display. It did open the door for Palm to create its handheld market — hands up who ever used a Palm? But the Apple Newton is really useful for sticking under the leg of your office desk if it wobbles too much. It lasted just six months.

The vomit Comet.

No one would ever spend millions developing a revolutionary jet and then take it off the market within a few years? Yes, actually they would. Enter the De Havilland Comet — the world’s first passenger jet to enter service in 1952. Too bad that within a year, three of the planes ripped apart in midair claimed more than 500 lives. But passengers did like the idea of travelling long distances quickly — and a little plane company on Seattle saw an opening. Its 707 jet thoroughly revolutionised jet travel. And it hasn’t done too badly since. Except for that, err, Dreamliner thingy.