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Humans are creators, creating events and experiences all the time through their thoughts, words and actions.

It is either from their positive side or their self-limiting (non-positive) side. The gift of choice that humans come with is no small feat. Choices allow creation either in a constructive way or not. When choices are made responsibly, one can create wonderful life experiences for themselves. Each available choice offers a certain set of experiences and outcomes. The point is: which experience gives more mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health?

How does one create? How does one construct their own reality?

One creates their own life events and experiences through choices they make in day-to-day life, which makes up the totality of life lived, and all lives lived, not just this one. Choices made in thinking what one chooses to think, the way one chooses to act, behave, react, respond. Choices in holding a certain state of feelings and emotions; either bright and or not, mental make-up; either inspired or not, intentions; whether pure or compromised, senses; whether clean or clogged with external influences.

From the point of intention and feelings begins one’s creation and re-creation, of all their personalised experiences, which manifests as reality; meaning, outcomes physically seen, tasted, touched, smelled and / or felt. Creation begins at the subtle level, in the inner environment of the mind and body and outcome is manifested.

Unintentional Choices

One creates through certain decisions/ choices. These decisions are made either in awareness or not. In experiences of past choices, made in non-awareness, if they still cause anguish, don’t beat yourself up. Consider them as experiences that were meant to be had. Such creations are meant to bring an individual to a certain point; a tipping point from where awareness has to start knocking. A timing for awareness, for opening up of higher consciousness, is also chalked out.

For any painful past action, know that you couldn’t have fast-forwarded your current awareness state. The awakening journey can’t be hurried before its allotted time. And this is so because certain conditions have to be met for the awakening or awareness process to take place, certain experiences must come together to form the tipping point.

In human understanding, such experiences culminate as a jolt of suffering. It happens when the time is ripe. Awakening has a ‘chosen’ time. Till then, certain events will keep adding up through unaware or ignorant choices, manifesting under themes such as; an unpleasant relationship or a financial setback, a debilitating health condition or a broken heart or any other.

Not all humans are born awakened. Awakening is an earned process for most of humanity. The twists and turns are to be savoured and persevered through, because awakening is a journey that unfolds gradually. Who chooses the timing? You, through a series of unconscious choices and decisions to land to the culminating point. Some call this ‘destiny’. But you see, how this destiny is also self-created, through a series of self- choices?

Ultimately, it’s all part of the Universal grand design for the purposes of consciousness expansion or awakening. Know that awakening is not one single event, it happens at multiple levels.


The important aspect in the process is, how one chooses to participate in their own creation. When an individual lifts up to life, life responds by bringing what is best for one’s growth and expansion. This is the grace of Universe. Such a phenomenon is an act of co-creation; when one acts from the field of inspiration and enthusiasm, one is co-creating with the Universal energy.

In the opposite mindset, that is, living life with a defeatist attitude-hoping things to work out, hoping others to come and save, hoping for luck to shine- is depletion of Universal energy. To quote poet Rumi, ‘you were born with wings, learn to use them and fly.

Disclaimer: Urmila Rao is an emotional healer and a forgiveness teacher. All the ideas expressed herein are her own and not professional advice or medical prescription. Listen to her podcast ‘Meditative Reflections-Dhayan’ on Spotify. Email: