The continuing adventures of the Caveman and the Diabetic Diva

 THE FARM

Diabetic Diva

The commonly held misconception is that all of Dubai is buildings and sand. Along comes a villa community like Al Barari, with wide lanes, really green tall trees and a restaurant aptly named The Farm just 20 minutes away from the hub of the financial district.

Opened a few months ago, The Farm is quickly becoming the go-to place for an oasis break, and it can be for breakfast, lunch or dinner. A large deck over running water and the lush greenery transported me to the Asian countryside but the heat quickly forced me to rush back to the main restaurant.

With my diabetic condition and the Caveman's Palaeo regime, it seemed like the right place to go and check out their ‘wholesome food the way nature intended'. Chef Yves de la Fontaine took the trouble of explaining the menu on a busy afternoon. No paper menus here; everyone gets an iPad and it works.

The Caveman and I had decided we wouldn't bore ourselves with the tried and tested, so I stayed with taster portions of two different salads, while he tucked into a plate of grilled prawns. The first salad was argula with green fennel, feta, walnuts, pumpkin seeds and pomegranate pearls with a miso dressing. The second, a quinoa and Camargue red rice salad with a sprinkling of pistachios, dried apricots, raisins, crumbled goat cheese and rocket leaves with a mandarin vinaigrette.

While they sound a tad too healthy they were refreshingly tasty. I had never tried quinoa before. It looks like tiny seed pearls. A little research informed me that it is a low-glycaemic alternative to rice and wheat, is gluten-free and high in protein. Perfect for diabetics like me!

The second course was the Salmon Rose, a salmon steak in a wrap that at first I thought was pastry casing and turned my nose up at, but to my delight it was grilled endives. I would have preferred my fish cooked 30 seconds less, but the colourful angel hair vegetables that accompanied the dish took my breath away. A mix of fresh vegetables julienned so fine that I decided if there was a machine that can do this; then I want it.

We pulled ourselves away because work beckoned but I'd love to take the blond there for a long evening and relive pleasant memories of Bali nights.

 Caveman

Put the words green, laid-back and wholesome food into one sentence and you'd have had to leave the UAE to find a restaurant with those descriptors. Not anymore.

The Farm, the concept restaurant at Al Barari is among a new wave of eateries offering options for vegans, coeliacs and other food fusspots, so it seemed the perfect place to take the Diabetic Diva to a lunch that wouldn't send her insulin soaring and leave me to manage the fallout.

We took an investigative taxi to Al Barari, arriving at a small, rather full restaurant of the sort you might find in tropical Goa or Florida. You can dine al fresco or in air-conditioned comfort, but as true Dubai residents, we flopped down on a comfortable sofa indoors and were promptly handed iPad menus. I found mine a little challenging, since some dishes listed sides and others didn't, but both of us delightfully wrestled with the many options available even to our restricted diets. Many ingredients are locally grown or free range, which simply adds to the appeal.

I finally chose red apple juice, a grilled tiger prawn starter with a mango and tomato salsa and miso-wasabi mayo, and, egged on by the Diva, 150 grammes of rib eye with a side of squash and turnips.

The two large prawns came nicely done, firm and slightly chewy, but the tang of the salsa and the savouriness of the miso took them to a different level. A drinks mix-up meant I had to send back the pineapple beverage presented, but the apple juice that arrived halfway through my starter was fresh, sugar-free and Palaeo-certifiable.

My steak was rather a surprise. It was so thin — about half a centimetre — I was sure it would be cooked well past medium rare, and while it wasn't thick enough to hold a pink centre, it was fork-tender and very, very moreish. A good steak shouldn't have to be carried by the sauce, and this one stood perfectly on its own, even without the excellent vegetables.

Dessert was the old Palaeo standby, the fruit platter. It's astonishing how difficult it is to get this one right — the fruit is most often unripe, but here, each piece was near about its peak, particularly the mangoes!

All too quickly, our taxi rolled up, taking us on a rather adventurous off-road ride back to the coalface. Thankfully there were no insulin-fuelled dramas to deal with.

BALANCE CAFE

Diabetic Diva

Dust, sizzling 46-degree heat and a sore throat left me yearning for a meal that would boost my energy levels. The Caveman suggested Balance Café and as it's only a hop, step and short ride away from the office; we just went.

Once there, I didn't really have an appetite for anything heavy and to soothe my itchy throat, I ordered a ginger/lemon fusion tea. One sip and I knew I would soon become an addict. It was hot, lemony and it had real ginger juice.

Balance Café's menu is calorie-controlled, but I unfortunately couldn't get myself to eat anything that was bland. I also knew that a spicy dish would injure my throat further.

The seasonal salad with green apple it was. For mains, chicken skewers with a hummus dip and a side order of green papaya salad. The Caveman ordered fish and I smirked; wondering if it was my fiendish influence.

Neither salad nor chicken held my attention for too long and instead of playing with my food I decided to abandon the Caveman and go see Dr Chandy George, the resident Ayurvedic doctor.

He made my day! While he held my pulse for the next 45 minutes, he made me happy and aware. I am going to live to be a healthy grand matriarch of 90, the diabetes notwithstanding.

The lifestyle shift and the daily dose of Glucophage had done its bit. The Caveman's eyes popped at my sudden transformation as we shared a tiny chocolate mousse on the way back to work. All I have to do now is go back and really savour the food.

 Caveman

All things considered, lunch at Balance Café was well, rather up and down. Across the street from the office, it's ideal for a quick workday break, but I wanted something more adventurous at this Ayurvedic-inspired eatery. I should have known better.

On arrival, I wasn't best pleased we had turned up at all. We'd booked in advance to try out the advertised cooking school, but a scheduling mix-up meant we weren't going to be cooking our lunch that particular morning.

Menus at the ready, I drowned my sorrows in a spectacularly uplifting Mango Immune Booster, a dairy- and sugar-free blend of mango, pomegranate, pineapple, orange and lemon juice with ginger and mint. It was so good, I ordered another - at 62 calories, whyever not? The calorie and mineral content of each dish is clearly marked, as well as whether it is gluten-, dairy- or sugar-free.

My starter was a gorgeous fennel and leek soup drizzled with pesto. It was thick and starchy, thanks to the use of the Japanese kudzu root, but the leeks came through strongly.

The main course was a pleasant enough pan-grilled, mustard-coated John Dory served on a bed of wilted spinach and topped with tomato vinaigrette. John Dory is a delicate flavour that is easily overwhelmed - but this particular piece was subtle, tender and flaky.

The Diva departed rather imperiously at this point to consult with the Ayurvedic doctor, leaving me to my drink refill — which sadly didn't have the oomph of the first. Thankfully, the chefs rescued my mood again with a delightful dairy-free version of the café's poached strawberries in balsamic syrup: soft yet firm, but tart and sweet at the same time. A balanced experience all right.

A LA TURCA AT RIXOS THE PALM DUBAI

Diabetic Diva

The interminable taxi ride to the newly opened Rixos The Palm Dubai on the far end of the East crescent had tired me. We entered the hotel expecting too much newness but we were wrong.

Off we went to the all-day- dining restaurant; a lush oasis of water and palm trees. The sun had just set; the temperature was bearable and the lively strains of classical Viennese music imposed a relaxed atmosphere. This was A La Turca on a weekday evening. The waiter swiftly plopped what looked like a metre-long thin-crust pizza sparsely garnished with spiced beef on a wooden board.

Etli Ekmek, we were told it is called. It’s an appetiser from the city of Konya in Turkey. It was hot, crispy and delicious, but too much.

While the Caveman went gathering his first course, I decided to get fishy and it was the best decision I made.

Dill-cured salmon, grilled octopus and squid rings, lightly sautéed prawns and slivers of smoked mackerel accompanied by rocket, mushrooms and artichokes ensured a splendid meal. My taste buds went through tart, salt, sweet and spicy, and the mix was heady.

I was almost full but the Caveman goaded me to try a little of everything. I wandered around with my plate. The diet section had lots of boiled bits, but not for me. I needed colour, so I opted for the very tasty ratatouille with some steamed asparagus spears and a tiny bit of boiled chicken.

Whew! I complained (as usual) that a whole buffet was wasted on me and the Caveman grunted. His mouth was full and he was already on dessert.

Caveman

A La Turca is a slice of the Mediterranean life. At the very end of The Palm Jumeirah, this indoor-outdoor all-day-dining restaurant is a great way to dine en famille: its expansive buffet is both a taste of the familiar and a great introduction to Turkish food.

It was still just pleasant enough to sit outdoors, and no sooner had we taken our seats by the band, than we were presented with a nearly two-metre-long minced meat pizza, a long, lean version of Lebanese Arayes or, in Turkish, Etli Ekmek.

Divine, the Diva declared it, and freshly baked bread is always hard to resist, so I dove right in. It was crisp and savoury and awesome, but I knew I’d regret it later. (And I did — by the time I got home, the gluten had done its worst.)

Of the many starters, the standouts for me were a soft, mildly spicy lentil cake and a roughly chopped but masterfully spiced Baba Ghanoush that was brought alive by a few pomegranate seeds.

Steering the Diva to the diet section, I loaded up on the mains. Meyhane Pilavi is a sort of wheat risotto served with a variety of kebabs. No wheat for me, but the meat, once again, was balanced in its spicing, although some pieces had clearly been left warming too long. The hearty lamb casserole was very nice indeed, slow-cooked in the oven with mushrooms, bell peppers, onions and tomatoes. The freshly grilled lamb chops were done a little beyond my liking, but this was my own fault — I didn’t tell the chef we cavemen like our meat medium rare. The winner, without a doubt, was a chicken and celery dish, with the meat extremely tender and the celery cooked down to the texture of soft white pumpkin. (I found out later they soak it in lemon water beforehand.)

For dessert, I walked straight past the many types of Turkish delight to the peeled fresh mango... ah, bliss! The worst came last: a couple tried to steal our cab – but the Pakistani doorman had dealt with their kind  before, and we were soon on our way.
 

KARACHI DARBAR

Diabetic Diva

As the Caveman and I readied to go to the newly opened 27th outlet of Karachi Darbar in Oud Metha Road in Dubai; I realised that I had always considered Pakistani cuisine too greasy for my palate.

As I am consistently looking for healthier options, I felt a slight dread that I may be paving the way to my diabetic hell. Also, I had always considered the existing restaurants as cheap and cheerful places for blue collar workers and turned my diva nose up at them.

Well, a short taxi ride later we came to an upscale version of Karachi Darbar — clean, well lit and packed full of professionals tucking into the food with gusto.

KD as it is now branded is an ISO certified restaurant company, which has decided to provide quality food at value prices. "We've upped our restaurant venues but we have not upped the prices and the food quality remains consistent in every outlet," Sobia Zaidi, the group's customer relations officer announced with pride.

The Caveman and I decided to do a joint order to ensure that both his diet and mine did not suffer.

For our sides we ordered the Karela Masala (stir-fried bitter gourd cooked in green herb gravy) and Vegetable Jalfrezi (mixed garden vegetables cooked in an onion, tomato gravy).

The Caveman insisted on trying the meat dishes and settled on a Shahi Haleem (a Pakistani dish of pounded lentils and meat cooked to perfection) and added on the Peshawari Karahi chicken, Boneless Chicken Tikka and an Aloo Mirchi Keema (minced lamb with chillies and potatoes). Naturally, for me any meal without fish would be incomplete so I added lightly fried slices of kingfish marinated in ginger and garlic.

I tried taster portions of them all except the oil-laden karahi dish. Every mouthful was a mini explosion of pleasure. I could actually taste the vegetables, the fish and even the chicken although it was spicy enough to have me reaching for my glass of water.

It is a rare experience for me to taste the original food through all the spices that are normally used in the cuisine of the sub-continent. I am happy that I disregarded my preconceived notions and actually found Pakistani food that I can savour.

Those vegetables surely beckon.

 Caveman

My early expat encounters with the Karachi Darbar brand left me with the conviction that Pakistani food, as served up by this particular chain, is best something to walk right past.

In recent years, however, the group has re-engineered its image, casting off its greasy spoon appeal for a more upmarket approach - at its newer outlets at least. But could it survive the Palaeo test? And would the Diva ever deign to clack her vertiginous Louboutins past the door of one?

The brand's newly opened Oud Metha outlet was just the place to put the recent refinement to the test. Much pleading later, we were taxiing past Al Nasr Cinema, where, in a blind moment of last-minute panic, I almost steered the Diva to a tried-and-tested favourite nearby.

I needn't have worried. She took to it like a duck to water, perusing the menu eagerly, swanning off to talk to the chef and generally winning the staff over.

What did we eat? Since it was lunch, we ordered up a storm — so that in case something was too greasy for our liking, we wouldn't have to stick with the complimentary salad and yoghurt raita they'd put before us the moment we sat down. Again, I was being too cautious.

My favourite were the vegetables. The bitter gourd, or Karela Masala, was packed with flavour and ever so slightly creamy, with just a hint of bitterness. The Jalfrezi was quite simply excellent - beans, peas, carrots, cauliflower, each vegetable stood on its own but together in the famous KDR Masala, they were a symphony on the palate.

Which is not to say the meat was inedible - quite the opposite, in fact. The chicken tikka was tender, juicy and among the best chicken kebabs I've ever eaten in Dubai. For Dh9 per plate, that's quite an achievement.

Although the one-pot Peshawari Chicken Karahi was pretty oily, the chicken itself was beautifully spiced. Even better was the Shahi Haleem, a dish of meat and dal that is slow cooked for nearly ten hours to achieve a paste-like consistency that unites the variety of spices used into something close to sublime. Like Harissa, Haleem is traditionally made with wheat or barley, but this particular version only features lentils and meat - perfect for gluten-conscious Cavemen! (My innards, which normally make a run for it with the merest touch of wheat, were absolutely fine.)

The biggest revelation of all was that nothing was cooked to within an inch of its life, as is so common on the subcontinent. You could taste the main ingredients in each dish, which is not how I remember this restaurant chain.

Clearly, then, it pays to go back for seconds.