energy vampire
Energy vampires exist – and they can have an enormous effect on our mental wellbeing. Image Credit: Pexels/Daisy Anderson

Do you sometimes find yourself emotionally drained after talking with a friend, colleague or relative? Or do you feel anxious and irritable after spending time with them? Watch out, you may be dealing with an energy vampire.

Click start to play today’s Spell It, where we spot the ‘signs’ and learn how to deal with them.

According to a report in US-based psychology news website, PsychCentral, energy vampires exist – and they can have an enormous effect on our mental wellbeing. As people who often have codependent personalities – meaning that they gravitate towards others to fulfill their needs and can find it difficult to be self-sufficient – energy vampires are used to taking, without realising how it could cause interpersonal problems.

So, how do you spot one? Common signs to look out for include someone who is charismatic, has a victim mentality, demands a lot of attention, talks about themselves constantly, has ongoing drama in their lives, doesn’t take accountability, and is pessimistic and needy. Energy vampires also tend to use guilt as a tactic to get you to do what they want, and expect you to take responsibility for them and be available for them.

Here are some ways to protect yourself from people who drain your energy:

1. Be assertive

Energy vampires can enter a conversation and completely turn it around to suit themselves. To stop this from happening, communicate your point assertively and directly. It’s a respectful way of ensuring the conversation doesn’t veer off, and remains to the point.

2. Ask for space

If you cannot avoid the person, you may have to ask for some space. You can do this by being kind and clear, by openly telling the person that they have a huge personality and it can be overwhelming, so you need some space.

3. Learn to say no

Setting boundaries is key to keeping people at arm’s length. Unless there are clear boundaries, energy vampires will walk all over your personal space. It can be challenging to say no, say, to a lunch invitation, but if the person in question attempts to guilt you, it’ a good reminder of why you’re saying no in the first place.

4. Guard your emotional capacity

Energy vampires are very good at using nonverbal cues to know when they can manipulate someone. Our facial expressions, how we clasp our hands, or lean in, can all be taken as signs of our investment in a conversation. When you’re dealing with an energy vampire, be aware of your body language. By offering stone-faced responses and short, matter-of-fact statements to their questions, you won’t open yourself up to their demands. This way, you can reserve your energy for yourself.

Have you ever had to deal with an energy vampire? Play today’s Spell It and tell us at