UAE | General
Expert's warning
Even though parents have good intentions, they don't realise that they are hurting their children.
- By Marten YoussefAnd Rayeesa AbsalStaff Reporters
- Published: 00:30 May 2, 2008
Dubai: Families rely too much on nannies to complete the most basic child-care tasks, according to a child psychologist.
"The family bond is becoming less and less strong. We have families today with four or five maids, each one responsible for a child. It is a common sight in today's malls to find children being looked after by maids, while the parents are not even nearby," says , Seethi Nair, child psychologist for 10 years, who now teaches psychology at the Abu Dhabi University.
Nair says maids can look after children but the danger is when they become like parents to them.
"Unfortunately, domestic workers are not child educators and they don't have all the knowledge to raise children," Nair says.
Even though parents have good intentions, they don't realise that they are hurting their children. "The implications of this structure in the long run are damaging. Children will become removed from their parents. No security. They will become dependent on others and not themselves," Nair says. This erosion of the family unit is the direct result of busy lives, says Nair. "Parents work hard so they can provide for their children, but they don't realise that what children need is time with them," Nair says.
The solution, according to her, is for parents to see the idea of spending time with their children as good as a gift. They simply need to reduce their reliance on nannies," Nair says.
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Marymma Cherian, an educationist and writer, says: "The first seven years are the most impressionable years of a child's life. It is said that the child's basic values, strengths and weaknesses are formed during this period. Parents should ensure that the child experiences emotional and physical security, affection and care."
The absence of adequate interaction with parents during these formative years leaves "a psychological dent", Cherian says, the result of which would be an insecure character.
Stressing the importance of playing in children's lives, Cherian adds: "In most cases children here do not even have good places to play or friends to play with. It is during play-time that children learn the basic rules of living in a group or society ... that is where they learn acceptance and tolerance and how to play fair. A play group would, to a small extent, make up for the absence of parents during most part of the day."
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