Business | General
Love on the job can be risky business
It can lead to results such as losing out on a raise or a promotion once the boss finds out.
- By Patricia Kitchen, Los Angeles Times-Washington Post News Service
- Published: 00:08 February 18, 2008
There are co-workers who meet and fall in love at the office - or, maybe, just have a fling. And then there are married co-workers who meet and fall in love at work - or, maybe, just have a fling.
If the first camp presents ample opportunities for workplace distraction and drama, just think of the dust storms the second camp can kick up - you know, angry spouses showing up in the lobby.
According to the annual Office Romance Survey, 48 per cent of 945 employees surveyed say they've known of a married colleague who cheated on his or her spouse with someone at work.
And 40 per cent say they know of a married - or otherwise seriously committed - co-worker who got a little frisky with someone on a business trip. The survey was conducted by Vault.com, a Manhattan-based career website.
Here's what relationship expert Robin Gorman Newman wants to know about the findings: "Are people that open? Are they that blatant? Or are they being outed by someone?" She says the findings speak to the unlikelihood of keeping such activity under wraps in the workplace.
And while finding out about single colleagues who are dating one another may generate a little buzz, the involvement of married workers really gets the gossip mill fired up.
And, Newman says, it can lead to results such as losing out on a raise or a promotion once the boss finds out - unless, of course, you are the boss. Gorman Newman, founder of www.Lovecoach.com, tells of a job she had at which a married partner was stepping out with a client.
When the partner's wife came into the office, "we all wondered if she knew." And when he was all "lovey-dovey" with his wife, Gorman Newman says, she and colleagues thought "you are so full of it."
While workplace alliances are not among the top "precipitating factors" he sees in divorce cases, Ken Koopersmith, a Long Island family-law attorney, says, "it happens not infrequently." In some cases, two marriages end up being dissolved.
So, if you're married, and are considering making a play for a work colleague, here's some advice from Koopersmith: "Stay the hell away.
"It can give rise to all kinds of complications and disappointments," he says. "It could result in your losing your job, losing friends or losing your spouse. It's not a good idea."
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